Paradigm Shift at a Pig Roast

*Check out the podcast version on Spotify or Anchor!

I was part of a book club this summer that went through Out of Sorts by Sarah Bessey. It’s about making peace with an evolving faith.

It really helped me nail down things I have struggled with over the last little while – particularly when it comes to the Church, her role in the world, and my own role within all that.

I’m hoping some of my own thoughts on this will be helpful to you as well!

As you may know, I was a history teacher before I started raising kids in Essex County, so this next bit really fascinated me. I’ve made it as concise as is humanly possible, but reach out to me if you want more!

The history of the Church has had four major paradigm shifts including her inception at Pentecost.

A paradigm shift occurs when a new discovery is made, new research is revealed, or new techniques are developed that changes the way of thinking or doing things.

Since these paradigm shifts have taken place roughly every 500 years, that should tell us a lot about where we might be heading!

  • The first was the foundation of the Church itself at Pentecost
    This consisted of the Holy Spirit falling upon Jesus’ disciples in the upper room in Acts 2. Then followed by the Apostle Peter being filled with the Spirit and addressing the crowd where thousands came to faith on that very day.
  • The second was when the Roman Empire fell, and the Dark Ages of Christianity were born, circa 500
    These medieval years were unfortunately tainted with Holy Wars and Crusades that did little good to draw ordinary people to the Saviour.
  • The third is known as the Great Schism in 1054
    At this time, there was conflict in the church. Most of it surround the belief that either Peter or Paul was the first official head of the church, as well as debates surrounding a Pope. My overly simplified response to that is… Jesus? Regardless, this resulted in the first of countless church splits. And the Catholic and Orthodox Churches were born.
  • The final shift took place during the Enlightenment Period and is known as The Reformation
    This is when opposition arose against the corruption and absolute power of the Roman Catholic Church and the Protestant Church was born.

I sure hope y’all enjoyed that little history lesson as much as I enjoy learning about these important markers of our history. Because many church scholars and theologians would argue that we’re about to enter another shake up in the life of the Church.

Buckle up kids, it’s going to be a bumpy ride! I mean, I say this in jest, but actually, it’s all very serious and intense.

Keeping in mind these important changes in Church history, I am dying to get to the good stuff of this post found in Acts 10, and I can’t wait to share some applications I am trying to adopt in my own life too.

Let’s check it out together.

Three main things happen in Acts 10

  • Cornelius, a Roman Centurion, is visited by an angel because he is a devout, God-fearing man who gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly (vs. 2). The angel tells him to send for a guy named Peter and have him come to his home. He does just that.
  • Meanwhile in Joppa…. the Apostle Peter is hungry and up on a rooftop praying. Suddenly, he has a vision of this sheet coming down in front of him and all kinds of animals are on it. Some kosher, some non-kosher.
    In his vision, God tells him to kill and eat. Peter, in his usual adversarial manner, argues with the Lord that he cannot eat meat that is impure and unclean. God tells him, do not call anything impure that God has made clean!
    They go back and forth on this three times. (Because apparently “three” is the magic number for Peter!) While he’s thinking about this vision and what it might mean, the men who were sent to fetch Peter arrive and escort him to Cornelius’ home.
  • Peter meets with Cornelius and tells him that technically he shouldn’t even be there since Cornelius is a Gentile (non-Jew) and it’s unlawful for them to even associate.
    Peter then asks Cornelius why he sent for him. Cornelius isn’t exactly sure! He tells Peter that an angel told him to send for a man by his name, so he did.
    Peter then realizes the meaning of the sheet with the impure and unclean animals.

And this is where it all comes together…!

This story is about including non-Israelites into the family of God. Because guess what? After Peter tells Cornelius all about Jesus, Acts 10 concludes by saying:

…the Holy Spirit came on all who heard the message. 45 The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astonished that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on Gentiles46 For they heard them speaking in tongues and praising God. Then Peter said, 47 “Surely no one can stand in the way of their being baptized with water. They have received the Holy Spirit just as we have.” 48 So he ordered that they be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ.

So, even though Peter’s vision was about God permitting the consumption of ritually impure foods, the vision was only a symbol God was using to prepare Peter for a huge paradigm shift in the early Church!

What was the shift?

  1. No longer have to keep kosher
  2. No longer have to be circumcised to be included in God’s family

WHAT DOES THIS SHIFT IMPLY?

NO MORE DIVISION
ONLY DIVERSITY

Y’all I don’t know how to communicate what a HUGE deal this was for the early believers. Or if we can fully appreciate what this meant for the people they rubbed shoulders with in their daily lives.

To think that after thousands of years, the very things that set them apart as God’s chosen people, namely: circumcision and keeping kosher… these were no longer requirements for being included in God’s family. And it is BLOWING MY MIND.

So what’s the point?

Friends, let’s be open to what God desires to change in our way of thinking. Now, don’t hear what I’m not saying. I’m not talking politics. I’m not talking Covid. I’m not talking the right or wrong way to do church.

  • I’m talking about each of our individual views of God. How we perceive Him, and how those perceptions INFORM the way we see our world.
  • I’m talking about how those views of God FRAME our perceptions of the people around us.
  • I’m saying, let’s ASK God for vision-of-a-pig-roast kind of moments
    • to shake up our thinking
    • to prepare us for what’s coming
    • to equip us with His wisdom and His heart to interact with HIS world the way He desires for us!
  • I want the next paradigm shift to resemble a Peter and Cornelius moment; rather than the schisms of division or the crusades of holy war that have for too long tainted the Church of Christ and her mission in the world.

And what’s the mission?

To love God. (Deuteronomy 6:5)

To love people. (Mark 12:31)

To make disciples of ALL NATIONS. (Matthew 28:19-20)

What’s in the Ears

This song is a little different than my usual, but it’s my favourite on Dante Bowe’s new album, as well as being very well suited to this topic, so win-win. Enjoy!

Ok I need to know your thoughts on this! Was any of this new to you? Does it resonate? Do you agree/disagree? Let me know in the comments or send me a message!

*Check out the podcast version on Spotify or Anchor!

A Seat at the Table

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This phrase is trending hard as social, political, and racial unrest continues to challenge the status quo.

Who deserves a seat at the table? Who doesn’t? Who owns the table? Who decides who gets a seat? Can I just build my own table – with my own set of standards and conditions of merit?

Let’s cool it for a sec, and remember that actually… NO ONE deserves a seat at the table!

No one is right with God. Not. Even. One.

– Romans 3:10

Now, there’s a story in 2 Samuel about a special seat, at a special table that I really think is worth exploring.

It takes place long after David slays Goliath, and after King Saul turns on David and tries to have him killed. Our story begins after David is finally crowned king of Israel himself.

Our new king asks a question. It’s a simple question, and we may not even pay it much heed. But he asks:

“Is anyone in Saul’s family still alive—anyone to whom I can show the kindness of God for Jonathan’s sake?”

2 Samuel 9:1

I had to ask myself, why is this on his radar? Why does David feel compelled to show God’s kindness to Saul’s family? And what would that even look like?

Here’s the lowdown:

  • First of all, he wasn’t actually compelled, because…
  • It was not out of guilt or obligation.
  • And it wasn’t even about Saul at all!
  • He was committed to a covenant promise he made to his friend, Jonathan. That’s it.

In 1 Samuel 20:14-15, Jonathan had pleaded with David to promise to show his family kindness even after Jonathan passed.

So now, David’s on a mission. He is determined to keep this covenant promise to his dear friend. And even though Jonathan isn’t around to benefit from it, or even know about it, he will not be swayed.

Finally, David finds Mephibosheth, Jonathan’s son. He was crippled after a tragic childhood accident, and could no longer walk. He was in hiding out of fear of what David might do if he was discovered.

Mephibosheth was terrified of David for two reasons:

  • He was the grandson of David’s rival and enemy, King Saul
  • His very existence was a threat to David’s throne and rule

So this is not an unreasonable concern or irrational fear. Because under normal circumstances, a new king would do everything in his power to eliminate any threat to his throne as well as any remnant of a former dynasty.

Mephibosheth was absolutely both of those things.

Instead of focusing on himself and his fear, he should have focused on who David was: the rightful king, fulfilling a covenant promise to his father, Jonathan.

Because David followed God, the kindness of God that David wanted to bestow on Jonathan’s family was a direct outpouring of the kindness that he had received from God first.

So what does David do when he finds Mephibosheth?

He doesn’t kill him or exile him. He doesn’t torture him or punish him.

David responds with compassion:

He tells Mephibosheth to not be afraid.
He restores to Mephibosheth all of the land that belonged to Saul.
He gives Mephibosheth a seat at the king’s table for the rest of his days.

This meant that David didn’t just allow Mephibosheth to inherit what had previously belonged to his family…

But through David’s extravagant generosity, Mephibosheth was invited into the king’s inner circle, and he and his household were provided for, for the rest of their lives!

Let’s consider how we might relate to this story.

Do you want a seat at God’s table? Do you, like Mephibosheth, see yourself as an enemy of God?

Isaiah 30:18 says that, God is full of mercy and rises to show you compassion…. not because of righteous things you’ve done, as we find in Titus 3:5, but because of His great love.

I hate to break it to you, but we don’t deserve that seat. We just don’t.

Because of the inherent sin we possess from birth, we are disqualified from a seat at the table.

Just as Mephibosheth whose grandfather, Saul, tried to have David killed, Romans 5:10 says that we were God’s enemies.

But as David made a covenant to Jonathan, which had absolutely nothing to do with the evil in Saul’s heart… so too did God make a covenant to His people that overrides the sin in our hearts.

In addition, David’s covenant did not hinge on the actions of Jonathan’s descendants: namely, Mephibosheth who was hiding out of fear of David and his own personal shame.

So in the same way, any ongoing shortcomings we may continue to raise as a barrier between us and God, do not affect the extravagant generosity of God’s covenant and the offer of a seat at His table.

Like Mephibosheth, we need our King to rescue us. We are poor, lame, weak, and fearful. We cannot save ourselves. We desperately need the kindness of God extended to us through His hand of restoration, redemption, and forgiveness.

But let’s not settle too comfortably into the seat of the helpless victim.

For we are not just Mephibosheth in this story – an enemy of the king. If you’re like me, and you’ve recognized your own poverty and need of a Saviour, then we can’t stop the story there.

Friend, you and I are also King David in this story! And he was known as a man after God’s own heart.

David’s actions here are like the ultimate pro tip on kindness.

How can we, like David, use our influence to fulfill the covenant promise we make as believers? How can we show God’s kindness to others, inviting them to sit at His table?

Here’s a page out of David’s book:

  • Seek out those in need of God’s kindness
    This required work on David’s part! Mephibosheth didn’t run to David for saving. David sought him out, not the other way around. Let’s not assume that because there’s no one in need at our door step, that there’s no one in need at all.

The Son of Man has come to seek out and to give life to those who are lost.”

– Luke 19:10

As followers of Jesus, we’re invited to be part of that mission and do the same! Because the fields are ripe for harvest, but the workers are few. (Matthew 9:37)

  • Bless those who don’t deserve it. Even our enemies.
    Ok, enemies is a strong word, and maybe you look around and don’t notice any. But surely you know people who rub you the wrong way… with whom you strongly disagree… whose lifestyle or life choices is perplexing to you at best.

    Mephibosheth was an enemy and a threat to David’s throne, but David’s relationship with Mephibosheth’s father, Jonathan meant more to David than that. And the covenant they shared was more important than any threat to David himself.

    Are we similarly committed to our own role in the covenant promises of God to show kindness to a world that needs it?

I close the best way I know how. By quoting a different Saul – who turned Paul, from Romans 12:9-21:

What’s in the Ears

In reflection… do you feel yourself unworthy of a seat at the King’s table? Mephibosheth certainly did! In fact, in verse 8 he asked David why he’d concern himself with a dead dog such has himself? Those are strong words!

Although we are undeserving, God has sought us out and offers us a seat at His table through His Son, Jesus. In gratitude of the kindness God has shown us, let’s consider how we may show the kindness of God to others in turn.

Have you got any thoughts on this you’d like to share? Send me a message or comment below!

*Check out the podcast version on Spotify or Anchor!

Youth Ministry, We Bid You Adieu

A pastor wife’s farewell to 13 years of youth ministry

*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify; or HERE on the Anchor app!

It was the summer of 2008 when my family embarked on our first and only trip to Greece (so far). My husband, Xavier, was still my boyfriend at the time, and leaving him behind for three weeks was the longest we had ever been apart.

I set off for the motherland with my parents, two brothers, and countless calling cards. Travelling internationally in 2008 meant unlikely access to unreliable internet and no smart phones for us to keep in touch.

Me + my two brothers in Athens

So international calling cards, Greek island pay phones, and a 7-hour time difference was the only recipe we had for successful connection during my stay in Greece.

I know what you’re thinking, and yes, we were as cool as we looked.

Greece was, as you’d expect, an absolute dream.

We spent two weeks on the home island of my Destounis family – my dad’s side. We visited the home in which my grandfather grew up in the 1930s during Nazi occupation. His sister still lives there, and was gracious enough to feed us and show us around the olive grove that still surrounds the family home.

From the roof top overlooking the olive grove of my grandfather’s childhood home in Kefalonia. My great-aunt and her husband maintain it now.

We visited cousins in Athens who took us off the beaten path of tourists and travellers to rooftop restaurants overlooking the Parthenon and other ancient landmarks, as you do when in Greece.

Rooftop bar overlooking the Parthenon. “When in Greece…”

Like I said, a freakin’ dream.

Meanwhile, back in Montreal…

My boyfriend (now husband) had been making plans to leave for Nova Scotia to enrol in a flight school there! He saved his money, had a few flying hours logged with an instructor in Montreal, and was excited to embark on this new career path.

He spent the summer as a youth intern at our church. And although he enjoyed the experience, we both felt pretty settled about his new journey to the pilot career he had always dreamt of.

One of our first youth leadership teams! Can you find us in the crowd?

When God has other plans

Between beach hopping and Greek frappé coffees, I would call my now-husband with the calling cards we had purchased for the trip. We missed each other terribly. And I wondered how in the world we’d manage being separated for months at a time when he’d go to flight school on the east coast, and I to McGill University in Montreal to complete my teaching degree.

During one of our long distance calls, Xavier shared some big news: he had been offered the permanent position of youth pastor at our church.

This came as a surprise to both of us! We needed to take some time to pray into God’s will for this ministry opportunity, and I just couldn’t believe that I was halfway across the world when this game-changer was dropped in his lap.

But the space between us was good. The time apart was critical. We were able to bring this pastoring opportunity before the Lord as individuals with clear minds, and come together – over our next long distance, muffled phone call, to discover that God had been gracious to bring us both to the same place, and on the same page… despite the thousands of miles that separated us geographically.

When a surprise open door leads to your calling

Xavier and I both felt so much peace about him accepting this role and changing our plans for the future. We were excited about this new opportunity to minister to the youth of our church. It felt so right, and we were so grateful to God for opening this door.

Xavier started the new position of Youth Pastor in the fall of 2008 and asked me to marry him shortly after. We were married in the summer of 2009, a year after my trip to Greece and the calling card phone calls that changed it all.

We celebrated 12 years of marriage this year! Which means Xavier has been a youth pastor for longer than he’s been my husband.

After 7 years of youth ministry at our home church, we had lived in two homes, had two boys, and lots of teens walk through our doors and into our hearts.

However, God was doing a new thing, and a new opportunity presented itself to our family as we stepped out in faith to a town called Leamington and a church called Meadow Brook.

Our last Sunday at Westview Bible Church in Montreal

Another open door, a new church, a new town, a new place to call “home”

We moved to Leamington six years ago when Xavier accepted a position as the Youth and Worship Pastor at Meadow Brook. There have been many highs, many lows, but God’s steadfast love and faithfulness to us unmistakably through it all.

Walking to our first youth night at MB: Baseball practice for church league baseball!

I think it’s a very good thing that God doesn’t warn us of all our hardships in advance, or we may not step into the spaces He calls us to. For those of you who follow me on social media, you might assume my highlight reel is for a journey from mountaintop to mountaintop. But no one can jump that high. Sometimes you have to go through the valley to get there. And let me tell you, there certainly have been valleys.

I’m not trying to be cryptic or overly dramatic, just honest and candid. Hardship is part of life! We all go through something that shapes us. Hopefully, it’s for the better.

The last six years of youth ministry for Xavier at Meadow Brook have been beautiful to watch.

It’s been a privilege to be in the front row of his growth in leadership and confidence. To pour into teens who are in hard situations… pointing them to Jesus, speaking truth, speaking wisdom, speaking encouragement. He does so much good behind the scenes and under the radar that only God knows. And if you know Xavier, you know that’s exactly how he likes it.

Speaking to the youth with our eldest joining in

So as we turn a corner and close our chapter of youth ministry, I’m finding it to be a bittersweet adieu. Seeing how effortlessly Xavier connects with teens and they with him… it makes my heart ache to wonder how their needs will be met going forward.

Thankfully, God knows. He’s got that covered, and we get to move on to a new thing, knowing He sees them and provides exactly what they need too.

Behind the scenes (our basement office) of recording/producing/streaming our Sundays services during Covid lockdown. He occupied this space for very many long hours over several months.

We’re not leaving ministry, we’re not even leaving our beloved church! But a new role for a man who’s proven faithful with little, and can now be trusted with more. (Luke 16:10)

Who knows, maybe we’ll even take a trip to Greece to commemorate the occasion.

Not in Greece. Still very happy.

What’s in the Ears

*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify; or HERE on the Anchor App!

Was any part of our journey new to you? Based on what’s been shared, can you relate to anything we’ve been through? Let me know by sending me a message or comment below!

The Long and Winding Road

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Have you ever heard a familiar story with fresh ears and been left dumbfounded at any nuances or parallels you didn’t notice before?

Sometimes I facepalm at the obvious things I’ve missed. Other times, I’m left in awe and wonder over some new revelation, thanking Jesus for yet another reason to love Him. This one was a mix of both.

I’ll make this a quick summary since most of us are at least vaguely familiar with the story of the Prodigal Son found in Luke 15.

  • A wealthy man has two sons.
  • The older son works hard to remain in the good graces of his father.
  • The younger son has had enough of playing by Dad’s rules and wants his share of the estate now, rather than after his father has passed, as was, and still is, the custom.
  • The father agrees and gives him the money.

The son bounces outta there before the door could hit him on his way out.

  • He moves far away, blows through the money as quickly as he claimed it, and winds up dirt poor.
  • He gets a job feeding pigs and comes to his senses, realizing that even his father’s hired help is better off than he is.
  • So he sets off for home with the hopes of convincing his father to let him stay as a servant.

While he was still a long way off…

This is where the story gets soooooo good, y’all! I hope you are HERE. FOR. IT!

To fully appreciate what happens next, we have to understand what was so unconventional about the father’s actions in the story.

For starters, we tend to focus on the prodigal son, understandably! His decisions, his experiences, his actions, reactions, and behaviour.

But to me, the character who raises more eyebrows and inspires the most questions is actually the father.

In The Cross and the Prodigal, Kenneth E. Bailey encourages us to recognize that in the culture of the time, the father didn’t behave as any respectable man would or should. After receiving his requested share of the inheritance, the son would have been cut off from the family. Completely dead to him.

But the father waited for his son.

How do we know this? Because in Luke 15:20, it says:

…while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming…

The father hadn’t cut him off! He was longing for his wayward son and waiting eagerly for his return. Verse 20 continues by saying:

Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.

Additional cultural context helps us appreciate how unusual this really was.

A man of this social standing, from this time in history simply… did. not. run.

He just didn’t!

And not for the same reasons I don’t run, ie: lazy, napping, busy eating tacos, writing this blog.

No, to run would be shameful and disgraceful. He’d have to hike up his tunic and expose his legs – no respectable man would do such a thing. It would be humiliating to be so exposed, and the embarrassment of running in addition to that would’ve been downright scandalous.

It’s also worth noting that for the father to see his son while he was still a long way off, he would’ve had to have been looking out for him down a public road where the community would also recognize him approaching.

It would’ve been commonly understood that the son was no longer welcome in their community because of his contemptuous behaviour towards the father and their customs. The son would have known this as well, which is why he’s fearful about his return and cautiously unsure about his welcome.

Keeping all this in mind…

We can see that the journey to the cross was for Jesus… what the journey to the son was for the father when the prodigal was still a long way off.

Jesus’ journey to the cross was shameful. His death? Humiliating.

And the father’s response to his son was similarly scandalous as he risked everything to meet the prodigal where he was, before condemnation could fall on him by the community of accusers.

Do you see the parallel? When the son was still a long way off…… while we were still sinners……

The father ran to meet him. He put his own robe onto his son… (I will sing and greatly rejoice in Yahweh! My whole being vibrates with shouts of joy in my God! For He has dressed me with salvation and wrapped me in the robe of His righteousness! Isaiah 61:10)

….and put his ring on him – the ring with the seal of sonship. (I will set you as a signet ring, the sign of My sovereign presence and authority. Haggai 2:23)

The shame of the son was COVERED by the righteousness of the father. Y’all, Jesus did that for us!!! While we were still sinners… a long way off.

So when our accusers surround us with condemnation, we needn’t recite our overly-rehearsed apology with long-winded explanations.

When the son began his own pigpen apology, his father interrupts him, and stars ordering servants around to get the welcome party started!

22  ‘Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet. 23 And kill the calf we have been fattening. We must celebrate with a feast, 24 for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now he is found.’ So the party began.

Meanwhile, in tragic contrast, the older son was working at home. Not being lazy or entitled, but diligently working for his reward.

Unfortunately for him, the father doesn’t honour this. So, he resents his brother and writes him off as entitled.

We may shake our heads at this brother who didn’t seem to understand the heart of his own father. Yet how often do we behave just like him?

We can see people abusing God’s grace and mercy in their own lives, condemning them in our hearts as unworthy of His love.

But the truth is that our Father doesn’t want us for what we can DO for Him!

After all, He loves each of us—good and evil, kind and cruel. He causes the sun to rise and shine on evil and good alike. He causes the rain to water the fields of the righteous and the fields of the sinner.

– Matthew 5:45

We are not responsible for our own redemption. It’s Jesus’ sacrifice on that humiliating cross that enables us to be fully restored and forgiven. There’s nothing we could say to earn it, and no amount of hard work and devotion could merit the position of sonship He offers freely.

Jesus paid it all… All to Him I owe….

Here are my main takeaways, I hope they bless you!

  • What the father did for his son was bigger than I realized…
    As was Jesus’ sacrifice for us!
  • The prodigal played a tiny role in his own restoration…
    Just draw near to the Father and recognize your need for Him!
  • The older son’s loyal work didn’t bring him into better standing with his father…
    Let’s not presume to know what God thinks of the people who are not like us, or behave like we would. Let’s not judge their journey to God.

Because ultimately, God took that journey to us.

And that long and winding road?

It led to the cross.

What’s in the Ears

I hope this familiar story has been made new to you in some way. Did you discover a new appreciation for the father? New compassion for either son? Share your thoughts in the comments, or send me a message!

*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify!

Dead and Gone

*Audio version now available on Spotify podcast!

Full disclosure, since starting this blog, I find it hard to read the Bible without a radar on the hunt for inspo on my next topic. This is case-in-point.

So, I was going through 2 Kings when I came across the most bizarre story spanning just two verses. If you thought the Bible dragged on to make a point, don’t look to this story as your example. It’s short and sweet, and weird!

So 2 Kings 13:20-21 starts by telling us that the prophet Elisha was dead and gone.

Ok, what it actually says is, “died and was buried”. But Justin Timberlake is a whole vibe. Even from 2008.

So after this status report on Elisha, we’re told that Moabite raiders were marauding. Meaning: to go about in search of things to steal or people to attack.

Some Israelites were burying some guy when they spot this group of marauding Moabites. They panic and toss the body into the nearest hole before running away.

That hole happened to be Elisha’s tomb.

This is already weird. But then… *pause for effect* the dead body lands on Elisha’s bones and is immediately resurrected upon contact.

When the body touched Elisha’s bones, the man came alive, stood up, and walked out on his own two feet!

– 2 Kings 13:21b

And that’s the whole story! Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

Ok not really… Besides this posthumous anecdote, here’s some background on Elisha:

  • Followed God
  • Performed many miracles
  • Lived life with integrity
  • Served God with humility
  • Prophesied boldly

Knowing this, I’m not entirely surprised that God continued to work through Elisha, even after Elisha was dead and gone. #JTReference

Well this unique situation – you know, where a dead man was casually resurrected because his body landed on the bones of a dead prophet? It got me thinking about IMPACT.

If our faith really means something to us, then it should mean something in the real world too. Otherwise, what kind of impact are we really making?

Are we leaving people better off than when we met them?

Because Elisha lived his life with integrity and in obedience to God, God continued to make his life count in the real world long after Elisha was dead and gone.

Oh how that inspires me!

The thought of making a positive impact on someone long after our paths intersect… isn’t that what it’s all about?

But this doesn’t happen with a sprinkle of wishful thinking, a dash of good intentions, a side of hope-it’ll-work-out, or your fairy godmother’s bibbidi-bobbidi-boo.

A life of integrity is a generous serving of self-sacrifice and a bottomless pitcher of laying down your life for others (John 15:13).

It’s trusting God in obedience when it doesn’t always make sense or suit us. It’s doing something for someone who can’t return the favour. When no one’s watching to praise us for it.

It’s real surrender in the trenches that produces the fruit of godly living.

Let’s consider this analogy:

Can I call myself a runner if I only think about running?

  • Perhaps I’m really passionate about my research on running.
  • Perhaps I follow runners’ blogs and Instagram accounts featuring the most popular runners.
  • Perhaps I watch races on TV and join online chats to discuss runners’ techniques and strategies.
  • Perhaps I have running gear! Sporting the latest in runners footwear and breathable apparel.
  • Perhaps I join a running club with runners who love the sport.
  • Perhaps I even adhere to a strict diet and exercise routine that is proven to help improve my running game.

But I don’t run. Ever.

Even with an interest in running, and head knowledge behind it, can I honestly call myself a runner if the soles of my shoes never hit pavement?

Similarly, can I call myself a Christian if all I do is think about the ideals I’m aspiring toward?

Run with me one lap further.

  • Perhaps I read my Bible and Christian literature about how to be a good Christian.
  • Perhaps I follow all the best blogs (like this one, duh) and Instagram accounts featuring the trendiest Christian celebrities (That term should be a red flag, btw).
  • Perhaps I watch viral sermons and listen to famous podcasts discussing techniques and strategies for Christian living.
  • Perhaps I dress like a Christian! You know, modest is best. I even have those cool shirts with subtle reference to faith.
  • Perhaps I’m involved in all things “church” and surround myself with likeminded people.
  • Perhaps I even adhere to the strict code of conduct that all Christians should! The do’s and don’ts that prove piety and devotion to God.

But I don’t submit to the Lordship of Jesus. Not really. I don’t trust Him with my life. I don’t surrender my will to His. I don’t obey God in the areas I know He’s called me to. I don’t sit in stillness to hear from Him. When I pray, I just talk at Him…

Oh, and I don’t love people. Not really. I don’t serve my community. I don’t love my neighbour (definitely not my enemy). I don’t pray for those who hate me. I don’t show compassion to those who disagree with me. In fact, I don’t give much thought to those around me at all…

Can I really call myself a Christian, then?

Jesus made it super simple for us. All the law and prophets can be summed up in this:

Love God. Love your neighbour (Matthew 22:36-40).

Here are some simple scenarios to illustrate this point:

“You were the only person who noticed me in school.”
“Thank you for checking on me, even if you don’t know what to say.”
“Your gift helped us get through an impossible financial crisis.”
“Thank you for being kind, even if you don’t agree or understand.”

I am the sprouting vine and you’re my branches. As you live in union with Me as your source, fruitfulness will stream from within you—but when you live separated from Me you are powerless.

– John 15:5 TPT

My prayer is that Elisha’s story would stir in us a desire for the type of impact that’s so life-giving, people actually come alive because of God in us.

A word of caution:

  • We believe lies if we think we can do any good without the life-giving power of God at work in us.
  • We ALSO believe lies, if we think a small act of kindness isn’t worth doing unless it’s moving mountains or calling down fire from heaven.

Since Jesus Himself compared the Kingdom of Heaven to tiny seeds and buried treasure… let’s not forget how significant the small and hidden things can be!

The enemy of our souls would have us believe a text to encourage a friend, or a smile for a stranger isn’t doing enough. So we end up doing nothing! Let’s remember that some of the most life-changing work of the Spirit has been in the grassroots, not the flashy stage.

Of course, there’s also hard work and sacrifice – you don’t live a life of integrity and obedience by watching runners go by!

Remaining connected to God, our Source, and obeying Him through little things? That’s a sure way to make a lasting impact… long after we’re dead and gone.

So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up!

– Galatians 6:9

What’s in the Ears

This song is a reference to Ezekiel, not Elisha, but it’s still super good.

Were you familiar with this story about Elisha? Does it inspire you to reflect on the impact you’re making? Share your thoughts in the comments or send me a message!

*Audio version now available on Spotify podcast!

But I Failed, Again

Before Twitter and Instagram were born, and when Facebook was still in its infancy, I embarked on my first semester at McGill University.

I was a fresh young thing, with a spring in my step and a dream in my heart. And, like most sheltered young adult Type A personalities – I was determined, ambitious, and painfully naive.

Y’all, this was snapped with an actual camera because our phones were used for only phone calls back then. Still paid for text messages by the letter, and no smart phones in sight. Hair was permed. Life. Was. Good.

After getting excellent grades in my high school and CEGEP (in Quebec, similar to a junior college) history courses, I was certain I’d experience the same level of academic success at McGill.

I enrolled in a Bachelor of Secondary Education, majoring in history and minoring in religious education. It felt like a program tailored specifically for me, as it combined all my favourite things:

  • a study of the past
  • a study of faith
  • all wrapped up in program that equips you to teach them!

Wow, was I in for a rude awakening.

I failed.

I did the one thing you’re not supposed to do if you’re studying to be a history teacher in Canada: I failed my Canadian history course. Just straight bombed it. It was ugly. It was embarrassing, humiliating, confusing, you name it – I felt it.

Spoiler: I did graduate.

Have you ever hit roadblocks whilst travelling on the road of life to your destiny, that caused you to question reality and everything that matters? I sure did!

I was very disillusioned with what I thought was my purpose, my calling, my destiny, my gifting… The one thing you long to discover you were born to do. That contribution only you can make to this world in your own unique way… Failure was devastating. Failure felt like the end of my road.

Some good news!

Don’t worry, Tina! They offer a supplemental exam, so credits could be made up by just retaking the exam!

Well, that’s what I did. I studied my ass off, and wrote my brains out on that supplemental. I was back in the game!

Except I really, really wasn’t. To my shock and horror…

I failed, again.

I bombed the supplemental. Which, by the way, was supposed to be even easier than the final for the original class.

As any level-headed person would, I began to question my very existence and purpose in life. My entire future flashed before my eyes as I wondered,

How can I be a history teacher if I can’t even pass a freshman level history course? …multiple times?!

I mean, it was a fair question.

To add insult to injury, I discovered that my initial grade would still appear on my transcript, and both would be calculated into my GPA. Fantastic.

McGill University convocation, May 2009.

Well, third time’s the charm. By the time I graduated from McGill, I had 3 attempts on that blasted Canadian history course and my poor GPA had all the blows to show for it.

Fast forward six years

I had taught at several Montreal schools, gotten hitched, and popped out a couple of kids. I’ll never understand the term popped out when referring to childbirth, as it is anything but!

I digress…

We were making plans to move to Leamington, and that meant transferring my Quebec teaching credentials to Ontario. Easy peasy! I’d be on the road to molding the young minds of Essex County in no time.

Except, nope!

We were married just a few weeks post-graduation!

You guessed it… I failed. Again.

Ok fine, maybe I’m being dramatic. I didn’t actually fail because it’s just a matter of paying to be certified, which I did, and I am. But I just couldn’t land a job!

I wasn’t invited for an interview. Didn’t even get called to fill in for the day.

I was just a resumé sitting in an inbox collecting cyber dust waiting to be noticed. To this day, I haven’t taught even one period of high school history, English, or religion. The trinity of my passions. (Still being dramatic…)

This was snapped shortly after moving to Leamington. Just waiting for callbacks to interview for a teaching gig. Never got one.

When failure is a catalyst

Well you know what? If life had gone according to my plan…

I wouldn’t have acquired the tenacity or determination that can only develop after you’re knocked down and resolve to rise and try again.

  • That I learnt after failing my history course.

I wouldn’t have come to appreciate that the most valuable lessons can’t be learnt by taking shortcuts. That the long way is the only way to learn patience, and strengthen your perseverance.

  • That I learnt after failing my supplemental exam.

I wouldn’t have been home with my kids all these years, with enough time on my hands to eventually step out of my comfort zone and start this blog.

  • That I learnt when the door of traditional teaching closed on me six years ago. But it took me awhile to see that one.

I wouldn’t have recognized that God’s ways are in fact higher and better. The type of “teaching” that I get to do on this blog and through Bible studies, are the very things I couldn’t even let my heart hope for. They seemed unattainable to me. Unrealistic. Beyond my reach.

  • That I learnt by looking past my failures and at God instead.

So turns out that failing over and over at that ONE thing I thought was my destiny, was actually God’s way of doing two things:

  1. Shaping me into the person I am today.
    Obviously this person isn’t perfect. And Lord knows I cringe at many things that make me who I am. BUT… I still like what God’s doing in this sinner. And I’m grateful for the lessons I’ve learnt through failure.
  2. Shaping my path to draw me closer to Himself and the purposes He had for me all along.
    Maybe I’ll find myself in a classroom again someday. I’m not above that. But it’s just no longer the desire of my heart. Sometimes God closes doors to open others we thought we’d never be good enough for in the first place.
In my classroom (kitchen table) writing lessons (blog posts) to share with anyone willing to read. It’s truly a privilege. (And slight hair upgrade from first photo.)

Three lessons from this failure:

  • God. Is. For. Your. GOOD. If you’re following Him, you can’t lose! Even when you do. Because He is always working things for the good of those who love Him. (Romans 8:28)
  • God is not at a loss when you fail. We tend to think that we’re in God’s will when we experience success. But what if our failures are a vital part of what God is working in us? Not just in our accomplishments, but in our hearts. (1 Samuel 16:7)
  • Do the next right thing. Hit a dead end? Feeling confused? Is there a Frozen song being quoted here? Maybe. But it ain’t wrong. We don’t get to see the ending from the middle, but we can do the next right thing. Don’t know what that is? Need wisdom? Ask God! He gives it generously to anyone who asks. (James 1:5)

What’s in the Ears

Regardless of what failure we’ve endured, this song is a beautiful reminder that we can always rest in the palm of God’s hand.

Tell me, have you endured failure that has shaped you? To be honest, it was embarrassing to admit to failure here, but I’m glad I did. If you have your own experience to share, I’d love to hear it! Message me or comment below!

Tree Planting

My paternal grandfather is 90 years young as I write this. He’s been through a lot, as is expected at that age. But he’s tough as nails, and has hardly slowed down. He and my grandmother live in their 3-bedroom home, and still maintain it impeccably, inside and out.

Taken at my grandparents’ home on last time I saw them, December 2019.

From the generation that lived through World War II, followed by mass emigration from Europe to North America, my grandparents faced all the ups and downs that come with post-war immigrant life.

The pair only met on this side of the pond as fate would have it (or God’s will?), when they found employment at the same little bakery in downtown Montreal’s Park Extension.

Engagement photo, 1957

They fell in love, got married, had a couple of kids, started a couple of businesses, and unfortunately lived through more tragedy than any parent should when their second son took his life as a teenager, leaving my own dad as an only child.

The years that followed were met with their own type of adversity since Greek-speaking grief counselling services weren’t exactly in abundant supply in Montreal in the 1970s.

Fast forward 40+ years…

…and my grandfather is in the twilight of his life. Because of Covid and a 10-hour drive between us, I haven’t seen him as often as I would like in recent years. But I’m told he’s in a very reflective state as of late.

He’s pondering life’s deep questions… Tying up loose ends of material possessions and family heirlooms… I guess you’d call that getting his affairs in order.

So what does all this have to do with our post titled, Tree Planting?

Me with my brother, grandfather, and a zucchini so big it’d probably win a prize at a country fair.

Well for as long as I can remember, my grandfather’s garden has been his pride and joy. In the spring, summer, and autumn months, he spends his days outdoors cultivating, pruning, tilling, grafting, nurturing, and harvesting a wide variety of produce.

Besides the more common cukes and tomatoes that are grown in this corner of the world, my grandfather – having the greenest of green thumbs – has successfully grown produce thought to be too exotic to survive Montreal’s climate.

Just a couple of Greek kids and a child-size zucchini .

Growing up, my family was always the happy recipient of the fruit of my grandfather’s labour.

Literal fruit, like cherries from his cherry tree, peaches from his peach tree, as well as lemons and limes, plums and apricots, which my own children have also enjoyed.

His secret? The man starts planting indoors where the temperature can be regulated and the roots strengthened. Once the tree is strong enough to be transplanted outdoors, he attentively waters and prunes it during the warm months.

When the temperatures start to drop, he literally digs up half of the tree and buries it into the ground as a way to hibernate through the subzero temperatures of Montreal’s harsh winters.

I personally find this to be absolutely WILD. Even before the days of Google, he was never much of a reader. He never finished elementary school (no thanks to the Nazi invasion of his Greek island home, Kefalonia), so I really can’t imagine any scenario where he would have researched this!

So if you’re looking for the secret to tropical fruit growth – look no further!

My boys and their great-grandparents with the dining room lemon tree.

To Never Enjoy the Fruit of Your Labour

As I mentioned, I haven’t seen my grandparents since before Covid. But even through all the hardship that this past year (and now over a year!) has delivered at his age, my grandfather has this crazy notion that he’s going to plant yet another fruit tree.

  • At 90 years old
  • Whilst juggling several health problems and complications
  • Limited mobility
  • Chronic pain
  • Harsh climate
  • Did I mention 90 years old?

The man has decided to plant another fruit tree.

Folks, I tell you this because it was the life lesson that felt like the ultimately wake up call to me. If we were sitting (masked)face to (masked)face at a safe 6 ft apart just visiting and sharing life, I’d be waving my arms around like the dramatic Greek I am and shouting this next part…

All CAPS will have to do:

HE WILL NEVER EAT FRUIT FROM THIS TREE.
HE WILL NEVER SIT UNDER ITS BRANCHES, NOR WILL HE ENJOY THE SHADE OF ITS LEAVES.

He’s planting this tree for whoever will live in his home next. For the future owners of his home. For the next generation. Without any payback, reward, or personal gain.

I didn’t know this when I first started working on this post, but there’s actually an old Greek proverb that says:

This post isn’t overly spiritual or biblical, but I think there’s a lot to be learnt from regular life and experiences too.

What if we all approached life this way? What if we made life decisions that didn’t necessarily have a direct positive impact on our own wellbeing? What if we just did something for someone else without expecting something in return?

To be clear, I’m very much NOT good at this. Look at this post as a way to keep me accountable since I’m putting it out there and you’re actually reading it now and there’s no turning back.

We’re just not naturally inclined to do something for others that doesn’t benefit us in return.

In the wise words of Joey Tribbiani:

When I reach the twilight of my own life, I want to be known for that too! For the selfless good deeds. For inexplicable kindness. For generosity that defies logic. For planting trees I’ll never get to rest under.

What about you?

There’s lots to work on, and I have a ways to go. But let’s not stay in the condemnation of all the things we’re not getting right, or the goals we fall short of.

As a final thought:

(because I love my Bible)

The Apostle Paul shared some inspiring closing remarks to his young protégé, Timothy, a young up-and-comer in faith and church leadership.

In this letter, Paul encourages Timothy to continue in what he had learnt from his mother and grandmother (since family legacy is important!). He then ends with a reminder that the wisdom of his matriarchs is based on the Word of God!

Because…

All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. 17 God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.

– II Timothy 3:16-17

The balance of this important reminder really resonated with me. We can be inspired by those around us doing a good work…

Example: don’t even get me started on my grandmother! She’s the most selfless, servant-hearted person I’ve ever met.

But we anchor it ALL to the inspiring words of scripture that God uses to prepare and equip His people to actually DO the good!

One last photo because look how happy they are! (Taken 2 years ago – one of my last Montreal visits, May 2019.)

What’s in the Ears

This song is about prayer, but it’s also about the legacy of faith we inherit from loved ones, and pass on to others. It always moves me to tears. Here are the lyrics!

Thanks for reading along today! Writing about my grandfather was emotional but special too. So I’d love to hear your own inspiring or special family stories! Send me a message or comment below!

Character over Comfort

Alright, I didn’t want to get into it. But sometimes God allows me to go through stuff that freakin’ sucks and then prompts my heart to write about it. So here we are. This is truly, from the overflow.

A few months ago, I shared about how my daughter doesn’t sleep and how it’s costing my very sanity. You can check it out here. Unfortunately, no change to report on that front. But it’s a tiny example of what many are dealing with in this season.

Our problems just won’t go away!

Maybe yours is related to…

  • the pandemic
  • polarized political views
  • relationship challenges (spouse, child, relative, friend?)
  • work struggles
  • physical health issues
  • strained mental health

…and all the ramifications thereof?

So let me ask you this:

Hearing that for the first time felt like a bucket of water dumped over my head; but like the coziest hug too… somehow all at the same time.

Some follow up questions:

What am I really after in this life? What do I really want?? Is it comfort? Is it ease? Is it a pain-free, smooth ride?

Umm, yes. That’s literally what I want. And all I want.

  • I don’t want things to be difficult.
  • I don’t want an uphill battle.
  • I don’t want to be pushed out of my comfort zone.
  • I don’t want to struggle.
  • I don’t want my people to struggle.
  • I don’t want to be uncomfortable
  • And I don’t want to grow. I DON’T!

This past year has been difficult on a lot of people, but not all for the same reasons. No matter your experience, I think we can all admit that it’s pretty much been THE WORST. We just can’t seem to agree on why.

Whether you fear the virus, the government, or what another minute stuck in your house will do to your mental health… we all have a choice in how we’ll deal with what we’re facing.

I confess, this year of survival mode for me has been with a lot of numbing. Numbing with Netflix, comfort foods, mindless scrolling, etc.

But is that the ultimate goal? I’ve really got to ask myself: is this all I want?? To be numbed out of feeling any kind of pain that forces me to deal with hard things?

And what then? Say I choose to deal with those things. Once that’s done and I’ve put on my big girl pants, maybe even matured a little… What do I do with it all?

It’s meaningless if God’s Kingdom mission does not become my own life mission.

Let me say that again...

If my life doesn’t become about God’s kingdom mission, it’s all meaningless.

At some point we must ask ourselves:

Do we actually want to be used by God in drawing people to Him?
And if following Jesus is so important to us, why are we not talking about it more?

These are just questions I’m personally wrestling with. I’m sorry if they ruffle feathers. But also, not sorry…?

Because honestly, I’m just nearing the end of myself with this extreme desperation for comfort over character. After all, comfort does not build character. As much as I wish it would. And the longer I sit in the presence of Jesus, the less I care about how cushy my sweet little life really is.

If you’re looking for validation in your quest for comfort, then good news is that you can absolutely settle for simply eternal salvation with a comfortable life!

That’s because God’s love for us doesn’t change. BUT! …our effectiveness does.

If you’re like me and the latter doesn’t sit well with you, then read on, friend! There’s work to be done if we’re willing!

Here’s what I propose regarding character > comfort:

Let’s get back to the basics!

  • LOVE GOD. LOVE PEOPLE. (Mark 12:30-31)
  • LOVE YOUR ENEMIES (Luke 6:27-36)
  • TAKE GREATER INTEREST IN OTHERS – less navel-gazing? (Philippians 2:1-11)
  • PRAY FOR THOSE WHO PERSECUTE YOU – or even just disagree with you! (Matthew 5:44)
  • BE HUMBLE (Ephesians 4:2)
  • HUNGER AND THIRST FOR RIGHTEOUSNESS – desperate desire to be right with God! (Matthew 5:6)
  • SHOW MERCY (James 2:12-13)
  • HAVE A PURE HEART – integrity! (Philippians 1:9-11)
  • WORK FOR PEACE (Romans 14:19)
  • WATCH YOUR ANGER (Matthew 5:21-22)
  • BE GENEROUS (2 Corinthians 9:6-8)
  • BE PERFECT – ok, ouch (Matthew 5:48)

We could go on, of course. But a common thread is that these can be super hard to do!

In general, we’re just not naturally inclined to do anything that might compromise our comfort. It goes against our survival instincts!

It requires intentional work and sacrifice. But these are the very things that will build REAL character in our lives.

It’s truly a matter of priorities. What matters more to me? Obedience to God, His will, His purpose for my life? Or my own plans and agenda?

Perhaps you can relate to this, but I have a tendency to manipulate my own interpretations of scripture or understanding of God’s character to suit my needs and desires.

Yes, God is for us. (Romans 8:31)
Yes, He fights our battles. (Exodus 14:14)
Yes, He works for our favour… etc etc etc. (Psalm 84:11)

These things are true AND biblical! But how they manifest may look very different from God’s perspective and our expectations.

My tattoo says: “YET HE IS STILL GOOD”. A reminder that even when things don’t go the way I want, God is still good. I am stubborn, forgetful, and lazy. So I needed this permanently etched on my skin as a reminder of God’s forever goodness. For a post I wrote about it, click here!

Let’s recall our original question, is He still good if He only sustains me through the very thing I’m asking Him to save me from?

Can I come to terms with that, and still trust Him?

Can I still believe that the comfort I’m giving up to follow Him will be worth the character He is building in me?

Worth the intimacy He offers in His presence? Is it worth it? Is He worth it?

Because it’s got to be a daily sacrifice of comfort.

Even more than that, it’s also a sacrifice of control. Or actually, the illusion of control.

I think this past year taught me that more than any other time in my life. I don’t actually control my life like I thought I did! The question is, will I trust God with all that this implies, or claw my way back to the driver’s seat of a car I’m lousy at driving anyway?

I’m almost positive that this blog post has got more questions than any other I’ve written. Probably because I’m still working through all this.

  • I haven’t arrived.
  • I’m not yet where I want to be.
  • I’m still selfish and moody.
  • Still fail constantly at all the basics I previously mentioned.
  • Still revert to numbing pain.
  • Still prioritize my own comfort over submitting to the character-building I know God wants for me.
  • Still learning to bring that mess of crap to Jesus.
  • Still learning to trust Him to sustain me.

My dearly loved readers….

I pray with great faith for you, because I’m fully convinced that the One who began this good work in you will faithfully continue the process of maturing you until the unveiling of our Lord Jesus Christ!

– Philippians 1:6

What’s in the Ears

Couldn’t bear the thought of slappin a self-promoting song onto this blog post. It’s always all about Jesus. This song is a great one for that. Check lyrics here!

The struggle is so real. The tension between comfort and character is palpable. But there’s goodness in it!
Do you feel yourself fighting against it? Or is your heart shouting, yes! To be honest, I’m a bit of both. So if that’s you too, you’re not alone, friend. Let me know your thoughts on this! Send me a message or comment below!

Too Much and Not Enough

Confession: I don’t know what it is about 7pm, but once it strikes, I hit a wall and can no longer parent. It’s like I’m a character out of Cinderella who’s out past curfew and turns into a pumpkin.

Being a stay-at-home parent means you’re ON for your kids at all times. And with one kid who isn’t a lover of sleep, it means we sure do see lots of each other during all hours of the day and night.

By the time we’re finished with dinner, I have a hard time even being around my kids. Is that TMI? My tank is empty. I’ve reached my limit and I have nothing left. I just can’t seem to be enough for them.

*Disclaimer, my kids are freakin’ awesome. They may feel like too much, but they’re really not. They’re just regular kids, with regular needs. However, I am a human mama with human limitations. I don’t have boundless energy or infinite patience. Even on my best days, my kids can feel like way too much! And I can often feel like I’m not enough.

Regular kids + mama with limits = high chance of not being enough for them.

**Disclaimer 2: I know I can also be a little much. Being married to an introvert, I’ve learnt that when my husband has had a difficult day, I can be a little overbearing with my questions, requests and anecdotes.

It requires a conscious effort on my part to Tone. It. Down! and not be overbearing, demanding, naggy, clingy, desperado… ya know, all the most sought after qualities every man loves in his lady.

But it doesn’t stop there, folks!

Being too much or not enough is a struggle in many relationships dynamics.

Take friendships: we can all think of that one needy friend – hey, maybe you are that friend!

That one person who never seems to get enough of your time or attention. Who needs more of you than you can give, or are willing to give!

With unhealthy boundaries, we can feel like we’re stretched too thin in meeting the demands of our time and relationships.

We can feel like we’re either too much for some people, or not enough for others. To some, we may feel like a burden or a nuisance. While to others, no matter what we do or how much we give, it’s never enough.

This is the tension we all have to manage as people created with limitations in our time and mental capacity. We simply cannot be all things to all people (Scripture taken out of context, don’t @ me!).

He loves me. Even when I’m annoying and clingy!

To find any success in these areas, I humbly propose the following:

  • Recognize the struggle
  • Put healthy boundaries in place to manage time and responsibilities
  • Ask God for His empowering strength to face each day and its demands
  • And voilà! You win at life!

Ok, ok I’m obviously making ridiculous mom jokes. But the truth is that the heart of this blog post isn’t about boundaries, tips on time management, healthy vs. toxic friendships, or anything else like that.

What I’ve come to realize is this: our culture of unrealistic expectations means that we can so easily feel suffocated by the needs of others. Or on the flip side, we can feel the pressure to shrink ourselves in order to not be so overbearing.

Whichever side you tend to lean on, neither gives us a healthy view of God. That’s what I really want to shed light on here, and that’s the real tragedy of this whole thing.

Allow me to make a few things clear:

  • You will NEVER be too much for God.
  • You will NEVER be not enough for God (excuse the double negative, I’m making a point).
  • You will NEVER be misunderstood by God.
  • You will NEVER be a burden to God.
  • You will NEVER be annoying to God.
  • You will NEVER be insufficient to God.

Why? Because God is not like us! He doesn’t get tired. He doesn’t lose His patience. He doesn’t expect something from us that He knows we were never meant to give.

He doesn’t roll His eyes at our neediness. He doesn’t get exasperated at our worry. He doesn’t get frustrated with how long-winded our ramblings can be.

Yes, He disciplines those He loves (Hebrews 12:6) and He is angry at our sin (Isaiah 59:2).

But amazingly, God—so full of compassion—still forgives us! He covered over our sins with His love, refusing to destroy us all. Over and over He holds back His anger, restraining wrath to show us mercy.

Psalm 78:38 (narrative edit by me)

Whenever I feel overwhelmed by the people who overwhelm me, I have to consciously remind myself that God doesn’t get overwhelmed by me. He doesn’t need a break from me. He doesn’t get His fill or reach His limit of “Tina time”.

Because the Lord longs to be gracious to me; therefore He will rise up to show me compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him!

Isaiah 30:18
Sweet scooter gang

Where do you go to fill up when you’re empty? Who could ever truly be enough for you when you’re just not enough?

I look up to the mountains—
    does my help come from there?
My help comes from the Lord,
    who made heaven and earth!
He will not let you stumble;
    the one who watches over you will not slumber.
Indeed, He who watches over Israel
    never slumbers or sleeps.

The Lord Himself watches over you!
    The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade.
The sun will not harm you by day,
    nor the moon at night.
The Lord keeps you from all harm
    and watches over your life.
The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go,
    both now and forever.

– Psalm 121
  • God is always always always available to us. ALWAYS! (Hebrews 4:16)
  • He created us for Himself! For the sole purpose of being in relationship with Him. (Romans 11:36)
  • He is fully aware of all our limitations and toxic traits, and they do not deter him from us. (Hebrews 4:15)
  • He knows every little thing about us, and still loves us completely. (Psalm 139 – all of it! Read it with fresh eyes when you need the reminder that God doesn’t think you’re too much or not enough.)
  • When we put our faith in His Son, Jesus, we are covered by Him, and can have full access to fountain that never runs dry. (John 4:14)

When you’ve been burnt enough times by people who want you to be less of yourself, or demanding more than you have to give, please please please – remember that Jesus is not like that. Yes, He asks us to lay down our lives to follow Him (Luke 9:23), but it’s so He can give us abundant life in return!

I have come to give you everything in abundance, more than you expect —life in its fullness until you overflow!

– John 10:10

I’d say that’s a trade in our favour, friends! So when you feel hesitant to go to God with your frustrations, questions, qualms, and needs – don’t! Don’t feel hesitant! He’s not burnt out by you. He has more for you than you could ever need.

What’s in the Ears

This week we’re showcasing not 1, but 2 songs!

The first was an obvious choice and truly ministers to the heart.

This is a perfect song for our topic too! It’s a recent release and the whole album is really powerful.

Talk to me, friend! Do you ever feel like you’re too much or not enough for your people?
Where does this land for you? Do you ever project those feelings onto God? Let me know in the comments or send me a DM!

First Impressions

They can be a lot of pressure! What comes to mind, is an opportunity my husband and I had six years ago to make a good first impression with potentially life-changing results.

We had been interviewing at various churches across North America in search of a new ministry opportunity. When one church in Southern Ontario invited us for a two-day visit including a formal interview and to meet some church leaders and the staff.

Quaint Windsor airport. Heading back to Montreal after our interview!

I remember the anticipation leading up to the interview as we took time to prepare, dream, pray, and freak out! Ok fine, I probably did the freaking out. My husband was calm, cool, and ready. Which is a good thing too, because he was doing 99% of the interview.

Besides the anticipated interview questions, I couldn’t help but consider how I might be perceived.

I knew all about that stereotype of a pastor wife vibe. I also knew I didn’t check all the boxes.

  • Love Jesus ✔️ (but I’m not great at trusting and obeying Him)
  • Love others ✔️ (but reeeeeeeally not as well I should)
  • Read my Bible ✔️ (but I find parts of it boring… yes, even me, the one obsessed with the Scriptures)
  • Pray everyday ✔️ (do drowsy bedtime prayers count?)
  • Listen exclusively to worship music (yeah, no… please don’t ask for my Spotify history)
  • Never cuss (define never…. damn it! What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?)
  • Passion for children and youth (umm sorry husband, you might not get the job and it’s all my fault)

It was so stressful to think about what kind of first impression I’d be giving during those first encounters.

Well, spoiler alert: I didn’t blow it. My husband landed the gig! And it was 6 years ago this past week, since that whirlwind weekend of first impressions.

Why are first impressions such a big deal? What is it about being asked to describe ourselves that makes us want to run for the hills instead?

Whether it’s:

  • a blind date
  • job interview
  • first day of school
  • first day on the job
  • meeting the in laws
  • or a small group Bible study…

The intense pressure we feel to project the best possible version of ourselves is truly palpable.

Hi, I’m God.

I’m willing to bet He did not feel the pressure, but in the book of Exodus, we find one of the very first times God describes Himself in Scripture. How cool is that?!

Let’s check it out!

Then the Lord came down in a cloud and stood there with him [Moses]; and He called out His own name, Yahweh. “Yahweh! The LORD!
    The God of grace and mercy!
I am slow to anger
    and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness.
I lavish unfailing love to a thousand generations.
    I forgive iniquity, rebellion, and sin.
But I do not excuse the guilty.
    I lay the sins of the parents upon their children and grandchildren;
the entire family is affected—
    even children in the third and fourth generations.”

– Exodus 34:5-7

Honestly, it gives me chills just thinking about it. After an already wild start for humanity, God’s like: “Ok, this is it y’all. Here’s a little about me and what I’m all about.

It’s been said, if you want to know what God’s like, just look at Jesus. But I would argue that God had been revealing Himself to His people, and trying to make Himself known and understood long before Christ walked the earth.

So I say, if you want to know what God is like, Exodus 34:5-7 is a great place to start!

Naturally, God starts with His name – actually, names!

Yahweh: The earliest recorded name of God, spelled YHWH in Hebrew. The name in itself is considered so sacred and holy it couldn’t even be uttered! Yahweh means “He who brings whatever exists into being”.

The LORD: When in all uppercase, it is another name for God. And there is none like Him!

God goes on to describe His character by painting a picture of who He specifically is in relation to His people.

Every facet of God’s character contains these attributes in their fullness. He isn’t one more than another. As James 1:17 puts it, “there is no variation or shadow of turning – nothing deceitful, nothing two-faced or fickle.”

Even though God is fully and completely all these characteristics, I love that He starts with grace. It’s a lesson in my own life to extend it for others and to receive it for myself.

Grace is receiving goodness from God, which we do not deserve and could do nothing to earn. (Ephesians 2:8-9)

Mercy is God withholding punishment we deserve and extending pardon and forgiveness instead. (Deuteronomy 4:31)

Being slow to anger has to do with God’s patience and delay in displaying His wrath against sin. Also related to His long-suffering and how He patiently endures our offences and rebellion against Him. (Psalm 103:8)

Unfailing love is SO hard for us to get our minds around because we cannot produce a love that is so unconditional or steadfast, but God’s love really is! (Romans 5:8)

Faithfulness: This scripture says it best, “If we are faithless, He remains faithful— for He cannot deny Himself.” (2 Timothy 2:13)

How are these characteristics manifested? FORGIVENESS!

God forgives iniquity, rebellion, and sin… to a thousand generations! (Deuteronomy 7:9)

That’s really good news!

But we can’t fully appreciate how good that news really is unless we read the whole of verse 7. Sorry y’all.

We’d rather ignore the reality of 7b, and live on the good graces of a God who extends unfailing love to a thousand generations.

But friends,

…what would have been the point of Jesus’ death, then?

We cheapen His sacrifice when we downplay our sin and its consequences!

The following paints a sobering picture:

“We’re not really surprised that God has redeemed us. Somewhere deep inside, in the secret chambers of our hearts we harbour the notion that God owes us His mercy. Heaven would not be quite the same if we were excluded from it. We know that we are sinners, but we’re surely not as bad as we could be. There are enough redeeming features to our personalities that if God is really just, He will include us in salvation. What amazes us is justice, not grace.”

– R. C. Sproul

Justice has to be served. We’d expect that from an earthly court with a human judge! So of course a God of justice has to punish the guilty, or else He wouldn’t be true to Himself.

However, and this is a big HOWEVER! If that’s where we stop, then there’s not much good about the Good News, is there?

It’s only in understanding that Jesus took on God’s wrath against our own sin, in our place, that we find the very best ending to ANY story.

Faith in Jesus means that we are always under the banner of mercy, not judgement. And God’s default for us is mercy every time to a thousand generations.

I’m reminded that mercy TRIUMPHS or REJOICES over judgement (James 2:13). Knowing God errs on the side of mercy means the Good News isn’t just good, it’s life-changing!

So whether it’s an opportunity to make a good first impression, as in our experience; or a chance to get to know the unfailing love of God – those initial interactions truly matter because they have a lasting impact on how any relationship will unfold.

What’s in the Ears

Y’all this song! A reminder that it’s His kindness that leads us to change (repent). He’s so good.

I felt so compelled to share about the richness of this passage, but they don’t call them hard truths for nothing! Can you share your own thoughts on it with me? Send me a message or comment below!