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Youth Ministry, We Bid You Adieu

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A pastor wife’s farewell to 13 years of youth ministry

*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify; or HERE on the Anchor app!

It was the summer of 2008 when my family embarked on our first and only trip to Greece (so far). My husband, Xavier, was still my boyfriend at the time, and leaving him behind for three weeks was the longest we had ever been apart.

I set off for the motherland with my parents, two brothers, and countless calling cards. Travelling internationally in 2008 meant unlikely access to unreliable internet and no smart phones for us to keep in touch.

Me + my two brothers in Athens

So international calling cards, Greek island pay phones, and a 7-hour time difference was the only recipe we had for successful connection during my stay in Greece.

I know what you’re thinking, and yes, we were as cool as we looked.

Greece was, as you’d expect, an absolute dream.

We spent two weeks on the home island of my Destounis family – my dad’s side. We visited the home in which my grandfather grew up in the 1930s during Nazi occupation. His sister still lives there, and was gracious enough to feed us and show us around the olive grove that still surrounds the family home.

From the roof top overlooking the olive grove of my grandfather’s childhood home in Kefalonia. My great-aunt and her husband maintain it now.

We visited cousins in Athens who took us off the beaten path of tourists and travellers to rooftop restaurants overlooking the Parthenon and other ancient landmarks, as you do when in Greece.

Rooftop bar overlooking the Parthenon. “When in Greece…”

Like I said, a freakin’ dream.

Meanwhile, back in Montreal…

My boyfriend (now husband) had been making plans to leave for Nova Scotia to enrol in a flight school there! He saved his money, had a few flying hours logged with an instructor in Montreal, and was excited to embark on this new career path.

He spent the summer as a youth intern at our church. And although he enjoyed the experience, we both felt pretty settled about his new journey to the pilot career he had always dreamt of.

One of our first youth leadership teams! Can you find us in the crowd?

When God has other plans

Between beach hopping and Greek frappé coffees, I would call my now-husband with the calling cards we had purchased for the trip. We missed each other terribly. And I wondered how in the world we’d manage being separated for months at a time when he’d go to flight school on the east coast, and I to McGill University in Montreal to complete my teaching degree.

During one of our long distance calls, Xavier shared some big news: he had been offered the permanent position of youth pastor at our church.

This came as a surprise to both of us! We needed to take some time to pray into God’s will for this ministry opportunity, and I just couldn’t believe that I was halfway across the world when this game-changer was dropped in his lap.

But the space between us was good. The time apart was critical. We were able to bring this pastoring opportunity before the Lord as individuals with clear minds, and come together – over our next long distance, muffled phone call, to discover that God had been gracious to bring us both to the same place, and on the same page… despite the thousands of miles that separated us geographically.

When a surprise open door leads to your calling

Xavier and I both felt so much peace about him accepting this role and changing our plans for the future. We were excited about this new opportunity to minister to the youth of our church. It felt so right, and we were so grateful to God for opening this door.

Xavier started the new position of Youth Pastor in the fall of 2008 and asked me to marry him shortly after. We were married in the summer of 2009, a year after my trip to Greece and the calling card phone calls that changed it all.

We celebrated 12 years of marriage this year! Which means Xavier has been a youth pastor for longer than he’s been my husband.

After 7 years of youth ministry at our home church, we had lived in two homes, had two boys, and lots of teens walk through our doors and into our hearts.

However, God was doing a new thing, and a new opportunity presented itself to our family as we stepped out in faith to a town called Leamington and a church called Meadow Brook.

Our last Sunday at Westview Bible Church in Montreal

Another open door, a new church, a new town, a new place to call “home”

We moved to Leamington six years ago when Xavier accepted a position as the Youth and Worship Pastor at Meadow Brook. There have been many highs, many lows, but God’s steadfast love and faithfulness to us unmistakably through it all.

Walking to our first youth night at MB: Baseball practice for church league baseball!

I think it’s a very good thing that God doesn’t warn us of all our hardships in advance, or we may not step into the spaces He calls us to. For those of you who follow me on social media, you might assume my highlight reel is for a journey from mountaintop to mountaintop. But no one can jump that high. Sometimes you have to go through the valley to get there. And let me tell you, there certainly have been valleys.

I’m not trying to be cryptic or overly dramatic, just honest and candid. Hardship is part of life! We all go through something that shapes us. Hopefully, it’s for the better.

The last six years of youth ministry for Xavier at Meadow Brook have been beautiful to watch.

It’s been a privilege to be in the front row of his growth in leadership and confidence. To pour into teens who are in hard situations… pointing them to Jesus, speaking truth, speaking wisdom, speaking encouragement. He does so much good behind the scenes and under the radar that only God knows. And if you know Xavier, you know that’s exactly how he likes it.

Speaking to the youth with our eldest joining in

So as we turn a corner and close our chapter of youth ministry, I’m finding it to be a bittersweet adieu. Seeing how effortlessly Xavier connects with teens and they with him… it makes my heart ache to wonder how their needs will be met going forward.

Thankfully, God knows. He’s got that covered, and we get to move on to a new thing, knowing He sees them and provides exactly what they need too.

Behind the scenes (our basement office) of recording/producing/streaming our Sundays services during Covid lockdown. He occupied this space for very many long hours over several months.

We’re not leaving ministry, we’re not even leaving our beloved church! But a new role for a man who’s proven faithful with little, and can now be trusted with more. (Luke 16:10)

Who knows, maybe we’ll even take a trip to Greece to commemorate the occasion.

Not in Greece. Still very happy.

What’s in the Ears

*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify; or HERE on the Anchor App!

Was any part of our journey new to you? Based on what’s been shared, can you relate to anything we’ve been through? Let me know by sending me a message or comment below!

The Long and Winding Road

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*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify!

Have you ever heard a familiar story with fresh ears and been left dumbfounded at any nuances or parallels you didn’t notice before?

Sometimes I facepalm at the obvious things I’ve missed. Other times, I’m left in awe and wonder over some new revelation, thanking Jesus for yet another reason to love Him. This one was a mix of both.

I’ll make this a quick summary since most of us are at least vaguely familiar with the story of the Prodigal Son found in Luke 15.

  • A wealthy man has two sons.
  • The older son works hard to remain in the good graces of his father.
  • The younger son has had enough of playing by Dad’s rules and wants his share of the estate now, rather than after his father has passed, as was, and still is, the custom.
  • The father agrees and gives him the money.

The son bounces outta there before the door could hit him on his way out.

  • He moves far away, blows through the money as quickly as he claimed it, and winds up dirt poor.
  • He gets a job feeding pigs and comes to his senses, realizing that even his father’s hired help is better off than he is.
  • So he sets off for home with the hopes of convincing his father to let him stay as a servant.

While he was still a long way off…

This is where the story gets soooooo good, y’all! I hope you are HERE. FOR. IT!

To fully appreciate what happens next, we have to understand what was so unconventional about the father’s actions in the story.

For starters, we tend to focus on the prodigal son, understandably! His decisions, his experiences, his actions, reactions, and behaviour.

But to me, the character who raises more eyebrows and inspires the most questions is actually the father.

In The Cross and the Prodigal, Kenneth E. Bailey encourages us to recognize that in the culture of the time, the father didn’t behave as any respectable man would or should. After receiving his requested share of the inheritance, the son would have been cut off from the family. Completely dead to him.

But the father waited for his son.

How do we know this? Because in Luke 15:20, it says:

…while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming…

The father hadn’t cut him off! He was longing for his wayward son and waiting eagerly for his return. Verse 20 continues by saying:

Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.

Additional cultural context helps us appreciate how unusual this really was.

A man of this social standing, from this time in history simply… did. not. run.

He just didn’t!

And not for the same reasons I don’t run, ie: lazy, napping, busy eating tacos, writing this blog.

No, to run would be shameful and disgraceful. He’d have to hike up his tunic and expose his legs – no respectable man would do such a thing. It would be humiliating to be so exposed, and the embarrassment of running in addition to that would’ve been downright scandalous.

It’s also worth noting that for the father to see his son while he was still a long way off, he would’ve had to have been looking out for him down a public road where the community would also recognize him approaching.

It would’ve been commonly understood that the son was no longer welcome in their community because of his contemptuous behaviour towards the father and their customs. The son would have known this as well, which is why he’s fearful about his return and cautiously unsure about his welcome.

Keeping all this in mind…

We can see that the journey to the cross was for Jesus… what the journey to the son was for the father when the prodigal was still a long way off.

Jesus’ journey to the cross was shameful. His death? Humiliating.

And the father’s response to his son was similarly scandalous as he risked everything to meet the prodigal where he was, before condemnation could fall on him by the community of accusers.

Do you see the parallel? When the son was still a long way off…… while we were still sinners……

The father ran to meet him. He put his own robe onto his son… (I will sing and greatly rejoice in Yahweh! My whole being vibrates with shouts of joy in my God! For He has dressed me with salvation and wrapped me in the robe of His righteousness! Isaiah 61:10)

….and put his ring on him – the ring with the seal of sonship. (I will set you as a signet ring, the sign of My sovereign presence and authority. Haggai 2:23)

The shame of the son was COVERED by the righteousness of the father. Y’all, Jesus did that for us!!! While we were still sinners… a long way off.

So when our accusers surround us with condemnation, we needn’t recite our overly-rehearsed apology with long-winded explanations.

When the son began his own pigpen apology, his father interrupts him, and stars ordering servants around to get the welcome party started!

22  ‘Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet. 23 And kill the calf we have been fattening. We must celebrate with a feast, 24 for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now he is found.’ So the party began.

Meanwhile, in tragic contrast, the older son was working at home. Not being lazy or entitled, but diligently working for his reward.

Unfortunately for him, the father doesn’t honour this. So, he resents his brother and writes him off as entitled.

We may shake our heads at this brother who didn’t seem to understand the heart of his own father. Yet how often do we behave just like him?

We can see people abusing God’s grace and mercy in their own lives, condemning them in our hearts as unworthy of His love.

But the truth is that our Father doesn’t want us for what we can DO for Him!

After all, He loves each of us—good and evil, kind and cruel. He causes the sun to rise and shine on evil and good alike. He causes the rain to water the fields of the righteous and the fields of the sinner.

– Matthew 5:45

We are not responsible for our own redemption. It’s Jesus’ sacrifice on that humiliating cross that enables us to be fully restored and forgiven. There’s nothing we could say to earn it, and no amount of hard work and devotion could merit the position of sonship He offers freely.

Jesus paid it all… All to Him I owe….

Here are my main takeaways, I hope they bless you!

  • What the father did for his son was bigger than I realized…
    As was Jesus’ sacrifice for us!
  • The prodigal played a tiny role in his own restoration…
    Just draw near to the Father and recognize your need for Him!
  • The older son’s loyal work didn’t bring him into better standing with his father…
    Let’s not presume to know what God thinks of the people who are not like us, or behave like we would. Let’s not judge their journey to God.

Because ultimately, God took that journey to us.

And that long and winding road?

It led to the cross.

What’s in the Ears

I hope this familiar story has been made new to you in some way. Did you discover a new appreciation for the father? New compassion for either son? Share your thoughts in the comments, or send me a message!

*Click HERE for the podcast on Spotify!

Dead and Gone

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*Audio version now available on Spotify podcast!

Full disclosure, since starting this blog, I find it hard to read the Bible without a radar on the hunt for inspo on my next topic. This is case-in-point.

So, I was going through 2 Kings when I came across the most bizarre story spanning just two verses. If you thought the Bible dragged on to make a point, don’t look to this story as your example. It’s short and sweet, and weird!

So 2 Kings 13:20-21 starts by telling us that the prophet Elisha was dead and gone.

Ok, what it actually says is, “died and was buried”. But Justin Timberlake is a whole vibe. Even from 2008.

So after this status report on Elisha, we’re told that Moabite raiders were marauding. Meaning: to go about in search of things to steal or people to attack.

Some Israelites were burying some guy when they spot this group of marauding Moabites. They panic and toss the body into the nearest hole before running away.

That hole happened to be Elisha’s tomb.

This is already weird. But then… *pause for effect* the dead body lands on Elisha’s bones and is immediately resurrected upon contact.

When the body touched Elisha’s bones, the man came alive, stood up, and walked out on his own two feet!

– 2 Kings 13:21b

And that’s the whole story! Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

Ok not really… Besides this posthumous anecdote, here’s some background on Elisha:

  • Followed God
  • Performed many miracles
  • Lived life with integrity
  • Served God with humility
  • Prophesied boldly

Knowing this, I’m not entirely surprised that God continued to work through Elisha, even after Elisha was dead and gone. #JTReference

Well this unique situation – you know, where a dead man was casually resurrected because his body landed on the bones of a dead prophet? It got me thinking about IMPACT.

If our faith really means something to us, then it should mean something in the real world too. Otherwise, what kind of impact are we really making?

Are we leaving people better off than when we met them?

Because Elisha lived his life with integrity and in obedience to God, God continued to make his life count in the real world long after Elisha was dead and gone.

Oh how that inspires me!

The thought of making a positive impact on someone long after our paths intersect… isn’t that what it’s all about?

But this doesn’t happen with a sprinkle of wishful thinking, a dash of good intentions, a side of hope-it’ll-work-out, or your fairy godmother’s bibbidi-bobbidi-boo.

A life of integrity is a generous serving of self-sacrifice and a bottomless pitcher of laying down your life for others (John 15:13).

It’s trusting God in obedience when it doesn’t always make sense or suit us. It’s doing something for someone who can’t return the favour. When no one’s watching to praise us for it.

It’s real surrender in the trenches that produces the fruit of godly living.

Let’s consider this analogy:

Can I call myself a runner if I only think about running?

  • Perhaps I’m really passionate about my research on running.
  • Perhaps I follow runners’ blogs and Instagram accounts featuring the most popular runners.
  • Perhaps I watch races on TV and join online chats to discuss runners’ techniques and strategies.
  • Perhaps I have running gear! Sporting the latest in runners footwear and breathable apparel.
  • Perhaps I join a running club with runners who love the sport.
  • Perhaps I even adhere to a strict diet and exercise routine that is proven to help improve my running game.

But I don’t run. Ever.

Even with an interest in running, and head knowledge behind it, can I honestly call myself a runner if the soles of my shoes never hit pavement?

Similarly, can I call myself a Christian if all I do is think about the ideals I’m aspiring toward?

Run with me one lap further.

  • Perhaps I read my Bible and Christian literature about how to be a good Christian.
  • Perhaps I follow all the best blogs (like this one, duh) and Instagram accounts featuring the trendiest Christian celebrities (That term should be a red flag, btw).
  • Perhaps I watch viral sermons and listen to famous podcasts discussing techniques and strategies for Christian living.
  • Perhaps I dress like a Christian! You know, modest is best. I even have those cool shirts with subtle reference to faith.
  • Perhaps I’m involved in all things “church” and surround myself with likeminded people.
  • Perhaps I even adhere to the strict code of conduct that all Christians should! The do’s and don’ts that prove piety and devotion to God.

But I don’t submit to the Lordship of Jesus. Not really. I don’t trust Him with my life. I don’t surrender my will to His. I don’t obey God in the areas I know He’s called me to. I don’t sit in stillness to hear from Him. When I pray, I just talk at Him…

Oh, and I don’t love people. Not really. I don’t serve my community. I don’t love my neighbour (definitely not my enemy). I don’t pray for those who hate me. I don’t show compassion to those who disagree with me. In fact, I don’t give much thought to those around me at all…

Can I really call myself a Christian, then?

Jesus made it super simple for us. All the law and prophets can be summed up in this:

Love God. Love your neighbour (Matthew 22:36-40).

Here are some simple scenarios to illustrate this point:

“You were the only person who noticed me in school.”
“Thank you for checking on me, even if you don’t know what to say.”
“Your gift helped us get through an impossible financial crisis.”
“Thank you for being kind, even if you don’t agree or understand.”

I am the sprouting vine and you’re my branches. As you live in union with Me as your source, fruitfulness will stream from within you—but when you live separated from Me you are powerless.

– John 15:5 TPT

My prayer is that Elisha’s story would stir in us a desire for the type of impact that’s so life-giving, people actually come alive because of God in us.

A word of caution:

  • We believe lies if we think we can do any good without the life-giving power of God at work in us.
  • We ALSO believe lies, if we think a small act of kindness isn’t worth doing unless it’s moving mountains or calling down fire from heaven.

Since Jesus Himself compared the Kingdom of Heaven to tiny seeds and buried treasure… let’s not forget how significant the small and hidden things can be!

The enemy of our souls would have us believe a text to encourage a friend, or a smile for a stranger isn’t doing enough. So we end up doing nothing! Let’s remember that some of the most life-changing work of the Spirit has been in the grassroots, not the flashy stage.

Of course, there’s also hard work and sacrifice – you don’t live a life of integrity and obedience by watching runners go by!

Remaining connected to God, our Source, and obeying Him through little things? That’s a sure way to make a lasting impact… long after we’re dead and gone.

So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up!

– Galatians 6:9

What’s in the Ears

This song is a reference to Ezekiel, not Elisha, but it’s still super good.

Were you familiar with this story about Elisha? Does it inspire you to reflect on the impact you’re making? Share your thoughts in the comments or send me a message!

*Audio version now available on Spotify podcast!

But I Failed, Again

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Before Twitter and Instagram were born, and when Facebook was still in its infancy, I embarked on my first semester at McGill University.

I was a fresh young thing, with a spring in my step and a dream in my heart. And, like most sheltered young adult Type A personalities – I was determined, ambitious, and painfully naive.

Y’all, this was snapped with an actual camera because our phones were used for only phone calls back then. Still paid for text messages by the letter, and no smart phones in sight. Hair was permed. Life. Was. Good.

After getting excellent grades in my high school and CEGEP (in Quebec, similar to a junior college) history courses, I was certain I’d experience the same level of academic success at McGill.

I enrolled in a Bachelor of Secondary Education, majoring in history and minoring in religious education. It felt like a program tailored specifically for me, as it combined all my favourite things:

  • a study of the past
  • a study of faith
  • all wrapped up in program that equips you to teach them!

Wow, was I in for a rude awakening.

I failed.

I did the one thing you’re not supposed to do if you’re studying to be a history teacher in Canada: I failed my Canadian history course. Just straight bombed it. It was ugly. It was embarrassing, humiliating, confusing, you name it – I felt it.

Spoiler: I did graduate.

Have you ever hit roadblocks whilst travelling on the road of life to your destiny, that caused you to question reality and everything that matters? I sure did!

I was very disillusioned with what I thought was my purpose, my calling, my destiny, my gifting… The one thing you long to discover you were born to do. That contribution only you can make to this world in your own unique way… Failure was devastating. Failure felt like the end of my road.

Some good news!

Don’t worry, Tina! They offer a supplemental exam, so credits could be made up by just retaking the exam!

Well, that’s what I did. I studied my ass off, and wrote my brains out on that supplemental. I was back in the game!

Except I really, really wasn’t. To my shock and horror…

I failed, again.

I bombed the supplemental. Which, by the way, was supposed to be even easier than the final for the original class.

As any level-headed person would, I began to question my very existence and purpose in life. My entire future flashed before my eyes as I wondered,

How can I be a history teacher if I can’t even pass a freshman level history course? …multiple times?!

I mean, it was a fair question.

To add insult to injury, I discovered that my initial grade would still appear on my transcript, and both would be calculated into my GPA. Fantastic.

McGill University convocation, May 2009.

Well, third time’s the charm. By the time I graduated from McGill, I had 3 attempts on that blasted Canadian history course and my poor GPA had all the blows to show for it.

Fast forward six years

I had taught at several Montreal schools, gotten hitched, and popped out a couple of kids. I’ll never understand the term popped out when referring to childbirth, as it is anything but!

I digress…

We were making plans to move to Leamington, and that meant transferring my Quebec teaching credentials to Ontario. Easy peasy! I’d be on the road to molding the young minds of Essex County in no time.

Except, nope!

We were married just a few weeks post-graduation!

You guessed it… I failed. Again.

Ok fine, maybe I’m being dramatic. I didn’t actually fail because it’s just a matter of paying to be certified, which I did, and I am. But I just couldn’t land a job!

I wasn’t invited for an interview. Didn’t even get called to fill in for the day.

I was just a resumé sitting in an inbox collecting cyber dust waiting to be noticed. To this day, I haven’t taught even one period of high school history, English, or religion. The trinity of my passions. (Still being dramatic…)

This was snapped shortly after moving to Leamington. Just waiting for callbacks to interview for a teaching gig. Never got one.

When failure is a catalyst

Well you know what? If life had gone according to my plan…

I wouldn’t have acquired the tenacity or determination that can only develop after you’re knocked down and resolve to rise and try again.

  • That I learnt after failing my history course.

I wouldn’t have come to appreciate that the most valuable lessons can’t be learnt by taking shortcuts. That the long way is the only way to learn patience, and strengthen your perseverance.

  • That I learnt after failing my supplemental exam.

I wouldn’t have been home with my kids all these years, with enough time on my hands to eventually step out of my comfort zone and start this blog.

  • That I learnt when the door of traditional teaching closed on me six years ago. But it took me awhile to see that one.

I wouldn’t have recognized that God’s ways are in fact higher and better. The type of “teaching” that I get to do on this blog and through Bible studies, are the very things I couldn’t even let my heart hope for. They seemed unattainable to me. Unrealistic. Beyond my reach.

  • That I learnt by looking past my failures and at God instead.

So turns out that failing over and over at that ONE thing I thought was my destiny, was actually God’s way of doing two things:

  1. Shaping me into the person I am today.
    Obviously this person isn’t perfect. And Lord knows I cringe at many things that make me who I am. BUT… I still like what God’s doing in this sinner. And I’m grateful for the lessons I’ve learnt through failure.
  2. Shaping my path to draw me closer to Himself and the purposes He had for me all along.
    Maybe I’ll find myself in a classroom again someday. I’m not above that. But it’s just no longer the desire of my heart. Sometimes God closes doors to open others we thought we’d never be good enough for in the first place.
In my classroom (kitchen table) writing lessons (blog posts) to share with anyone willing to read. It’s truly a privilege. (And slight hair upgrade from first photo.)

Three lessons from this failure:

  • God. Is. For. Your. GOOD. If you’re following Him, you can’t lose! Even when you do. Because He is always working things for the good of those who love Him. (Romans 8:28)
  • God is not at a loss when you fail. We tend to think that we’re in God’s will when we experience success. But what if our failures are a vital part of what God is working in us? Not just in our accomplishments, but in our hearts. (1 Samuel 16:7)
  • Do the next right thing. Hit a dead end? Feeling confused? Is there a Frozen song being quoted here? Maybe. But it ain’t wrong. We don’t get to see the ending from the middle, but we can do the next right thing. Don’t know what that is? Need wisdom? Ask God! He gives it generously to anyone who asks. (James 1:5)

What’s in the Ears

Regardless of what failure we’ve endured, this song is a beautiful reminder that we can always rest in the palm of God’s hand.

Tell me, have you endured failure that has shaped you? To be honest, it was embarrassing to admit to failure here, but I’m glad I did. If you have your own experience to share, I’d love to hear it! Message me or comment below!

Tree Planting

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My paternal grandfather is 90 years young as I write this. He’s been through a lot, as is expected at that age. But he’s tough as nails, and has hardly slowed down. He and my grandmother live in their 3-bedroom home, and still maintain it impeccably, inside and out.

Taken at my grandparents’ home on last time I saw them, December 2019.

From the generation that lived through World War II, followed by mass emigration from Europe to North America, my grandparents faced all the ups and downs that come with post-war immigrant life.

The pair only met on this side of the pond as fate would have it (or God’s will?), when they found employment at the same little bakery in downtown Montreal’s Park Extension.

Engagement photo, 1957

They fell in love, got married, had a couple of kids, started a couple of businesses, and unfortunately lived through more tragedy than any parent should when their second son took his life as a teenager, leaving my own dad as an only child.

The years that followed were met with their own type of adversity since Greek-speaking grief counselling services weren’t exactly in abundant supply in Montreal in the 1970s.

Fast forward 40+ years…

…and my grandfather is in the twilight of his life. Because of Covid and a 10-hour drive between us, I haven’t seen him as often as I would like in recent years. But I’m told he’s in a very reflective state as of late.

He’s pondering life’s deep questions… Tying up loose ends of material possessions and family heirlooms… I guess you’d call that getting his affairs in order.

So what does all this have to do with our post titled, Tree Planting?

Me with my brother, grandfather, and a zucchini so big it’d probably win a prize at a country fair.

Well for as long as I can remember, my grandfather’s garden has been his pride and joy. In the spring, summer, and autumn months, he spends his days outdoors cultivating, pruning, tilling, grafting, nurturing, and harvesting a wide variety of produce.

Besides the more common cukes and tomatoes that are grown in this corner of the world, my grandfather – having the greenest of green thumbs – has successfully grown produce thought to be too exotic to survive Montreal’s climate.

Just a couple of Greek kids and a child-size zucchini .

Growing up, my family was always the happy recipient of the fruit of my grandfather’s labour.

Literal fruit, like cherries from his cherry tree, peaches from his peach tree, as well as lemons and limes, plums and apricots, which my own children have also enjoyed.

His secret? The man starts planting indoors where the temperature can be regulated and the roots strengthened. Once the tree is strong enough to be transplanted outdoors, he attentively waters and prunes it during the warm months.

When the temperatures start to drop, he literally digs up half of the tree and buries it into the ground as a way to hibernate through the subzero temperatures of Montreal’s harsh winters.

I personally find this to be absolutely WILD. Even before the days of Google, he was never much of a reader. He never finished elementary school (no thanks to the Nazi invasion of his Greek island home, Kefalonia), so I really can’t imagine any scenario where he would have researched this!

So if you’re looking for the secret to tropical fruit growth – look no further!

My boys and their great-grandparents with the dining room lemon tree.

To Never Enjoy the Fruit of Your Labour

As I mentioned, I haven’t seen my grandparents since before Covid. But even through all the hardship that this past year (and now over a year!) has delivered at his age, my grandfather has this crazy notion that he’s going to plant yet another fruit tree.

  • At 90 years old
  • Whilst juggling several health problems and complications
  • Limited mobility
  • Chronic pain
  • Harsh climate
  • Did I mention 90 years old?

The man has decided to plant another fruit tree.

Folks, I tell you this because it was the life lesson that felt like the ultimately wake up call to me. If we were sitting (masked)face to (masked)face at a safe 6 ft apart just visiting and sharing life, I’d be waving my arms around like the dramatic Greek I am and shouting this next part…

All CAPS will have to do:

HE WILL NEVER EAT FRUIT FROM THIS TREE.
HE WILL NEVER SIT UNDER ITS BRANCHES, NOR WILL HE ENJOY THE SHADE OF ITS LEAVES.

He’s planting this tree for whoever will live in his home next. For the future owners of his home. For the next generation. Without any payback, reward, or personal gain.

I didn’t know this when I first started working on this post, but there’s actually an old Greek proverb that says:

This post isn’t overly spiritual or biblical, but I think there’s a lot to be learnt from regular life and experiences too.

What if we all approached life this way? What if we made life decisions that didn’t necessarily have a direct positive impact on our own wellbeing? What if we just did something for someone else without expecting something in return?

To be clear, I’m very much NOT good at this. Look at this post as a way to keep me accountable since I’m putting it out there and you’re actually reading it now and there’s no turning back.

We’re just not naturally inclined to do something for others that doesn’t benefit us in return.

In the wise words of Joey Tribbiani:

When I reach the twilight of my own life, I want to be known for that too! For the selfless good deeds. For inexplicable kindness. For generosity that defies logic. For planting trees I’ll never get to rest under.

What about you?

There’s lots to work on, and I have a ways to go. But let’s not stay in the condemnation of all the things we’re not getting right, or the goals we fall short of.

As a final thought:

(because I love my Bible)

The Apostle Paul shared some inspiring closing remarks to his young protégé, Timothy, a young up-and-comer in faith and church leadership.

In this letter, Paul encourages Timothy to continue in what he had learnt from his mother and grandmother (since family legacy is important!). He then ends with a reminder that the wisdom of his matriarchs is based on the Word of God!

Because…

All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. 17 God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.

– II Timothy 3:16-17

The balance of this important reminder really resonated with me. We can be inspired by those around us doing a good work…

Example: don’t even get me started on my grandmother! She’s the most selfless, servant-hearted person I’ve ever met.

But we anchor it ALL to the inspiring words of scripture that God uses to prepare and equip His people to actually DO the good!

One last photo because look how happy they are! (Taken 2 years ago – one of my last Montreal visits, May 2019.)

What’s in the Ears

This song is about prayer, but it’s also about the legacy of faith we inherit from loved ones, and pass on to others. It always moves me to tears. Here are the lyrics!

Thanks for reading along today! Writing about my grandfather was emotional but special too. So I’d love to hear your own inspiring or special family stories! Send me a message or comment below!

Character over Comfort

Published on by tinavila204 Comments

Alright, I didn’t want to get into it. But sometimes God allows me to go through stuff that freakin’ sucks and then prompts my heart to write about it. So here we are. This is truly, from the overflow.

A few months ago, I shared about how my daughter doesn’t sleep and how it’s costing my very sanity. You can check it out here. Unfortunately, no change to report on that front. But it’s a tiny example of what many are dealing with in this season.

Our problems just won’t go away!

Maybe yours is related to…

  • the pandemic
  • polarized political views
  • relationship challenges (spouse, child, relative, friend?)
  • work struggles
  • physical health issues
  • strained mental health

…and all the ramifications thereof?

So let me ask you this:

Hearing that for the first time felt like a bucket of water dumped over my head; but like the coziest hug too… somehow all at the same time.

Some follow up questions:

What am I really after in this life? What do I really want?? Is it comfort? Is it ease? Is it a pain-free, smooth ride?

Umm, yes. That’s literally what I want. And all I want.

  • I don’t want things to be difficult.
  • I don’t want an uphill battle.
  • I don’t want to be pushed out of my comfort zone.
  • I don’t want to struggle.
  • I don’t want my people to struggle.
  • I don’t want to be uncomfortable
  • And I don’t want to grow. I DON’T!

This past year has been difficult on a lot of people, but not all for the same reasons. No matter your experience, I think we can all admit that it’s pretty much been THE WORST. We just can’t seem to agree on why.

Whether you fear the virus, the government, or what another minute stuck in your house will do to your mental health… we all have a choice in how we’ll deal with what we’re facing.

I confess, this year of survival mode for me has been with a lot of numbing. Numbing with Netflix, comfort foods, mindless scrolling, etc.

But is that the ultimate goal? I’ve really got to ask myself: is this all I want?? To be numbed out of feeling any kind of pain that forces me to deal with hard things?

And what then? Say I choose to deal with those things. Once that’s done and I’ve put on my big girl pants, maybe even matured a little… What do I do with it all?

It’s meaningless if God’s Kingdom mission does not become my own life mission.

Let me say that again...

If my life doesn’t become about God’s kingdom mission, it’s all meaningless.

At some point we must ask ourselves:

Do we actually want to be used by God in drawing people to Him?
And if following Jesus is so important to us, why are we not talking about it more?

These are just questions I’m personally wrestling with. I’m sorry if they ruffle feathers. But also, not sorry…?

Because honestly, I’m just nearing the end of myself with this extreme desperation for comfort over character. After all, comfort does not build character. As much as I wish it would. And the longer I sit in the presence of Jesus, the less I care about how cushy my sweet little life really is.

If you’re looking for validation in your quest for comfort, then good news is that you can absolutely settle for simply eternal salvation with a comfortable life!

That’s because God’s love for us doesn’t change. BUT! …our effectiveness does.

If you’re like me and the latter doesn’t sit well with you, then read on, friend! There’s work to be done if we’re willing!

Here’s what I propose regarding character > comfort:

Let’s get back to the basics!

  • LOVE GOD. LOVE PEOPLE. (Mark 12:30-31)
  • LOVE YOUR ENEMIES (Luke 6:27-36)
  • TAKE GREATER INTEREST IN OTHERS – less navel-gazing? (Philippians 2:1-11)
  • PRAY FOR THOSE WHO PERSECUTE YOU – or even just disagree with you! (Matthew 5:44)
  • BE HUMBLE (Ephesians 4:2)
  • HUNGER AND THIRST FOR RIGHTEOUSNESS – desperate desire to be right with God! (Matthew 5:6)
  • SHOW MERCY (James 2:12-13)
  • HAVE A PURE HEART – integrity! (Philippians 1:9-11)
  • WORK FOR PEACE (Romans 14:19)
  • WATCH YOUR ANGER (Matthew 5:21-22)
  • BE GENEROUS (2 Corinthians 9:6-8)
  • BE PERFECT – ok, ouch (Matthew 5:48)

We could go on, of course. But a common thread is that these can be super hard to do!

In general, we’re just not naturally inclined to do anything that might compromise our comfort. It goes against our survival instincts!

It requires intentional work and sacrifice. But these are the very things that will build REAL character in our lives.

It’s truly a matter of priorities. What matters more to me? Obedience to God, His will, His purpose for my life? Or my own plans and agenda?

Perhaps you can relate to this, but I have a tendency to manipulate my own interpretations of scripture or understanding of God’s character to suit my needs and desires.

Yes, God is for us. (Romans 8:31)
Yes, He fights our battles. (Exodus 14:14)
Yes, He works for our favour… etc etc etc. (Psalm 84:11)

These things are true AND biblical! But how they manifest may look very different from God’s perspective and our expectations.

My tattoo says: “YET HE IS STILL GOOD”. A reminder that even when things don’t go the way I want, God is still good. I am stubborn, forgetful, and lazy. So I needed this permanently etched on my skin as a reminder of God’s forever goodness. For a post I wrote about it, click here!

Let’s recall our original question, is He still good if He only sustains me through the very thing I’m asking Him to save me from?

Can I come to terms with that, and still trust Him?

Can I still believe that the comfort I’m giving up to follow Him will be worth the character He is building in me?

Worth the intimacy He offers in His presence? Is it worth it? Is He worth it?

Because it’s got to be a daily sacrifice of comfort.

Even more than that, it’s also a sacrifice of control. Or actually, the illusion of control.

I think this past year taught me that more than any other time in my life. I don’t actually control my life like I thought I did! The question is, will I trust God with all that this implies, or claw my way back to the driver’s seat of a car I’m lousy at driving anyway?

I’m almost positive that this blog post has got more questions than any other I’ve written. Probably because I’m still working through all this.

  • I haven’t arrived.
  • I’m not yet where I want to be.
  • I’m still selfish and moody.
  • Still fail constantly at all the basics I previously mentioned.
  • Still revert to numbing pain.
  • Still prioritize my own comfort over submitting to the character-building I know God wants for me.
  • Still learning to bring that mess of crap to Jesus.
  • Still learning to trust Him to sustain me.

My dearly loved readers….

I pray with great faith for you, because I’m fully convinced that the One who began this good work in you will faithfully continue the process of maturing you until the unveiling of our Lord Jesus Christ!

– Philippians 1:6

What’s in the Ears

Couldn’t bear the thought of slappin a self-promoting song onto this blog post. It’s always all about Jesus. This song is a great one for that. Check lyrics here!

The struggle is so real. The tension between comfort and character is palpable. But there’s goodness in it!
Do you feel yourself fighting against it? Or is your heart shouting, yes! To be honest, I’m a bit of both. So if that’s you too, you’re not alone, friend. Let me know your thoughts on this! Send me a message or comment below!

Too Much and Not Enough

Published on by tinavila20Leave a comment

Confession: I don’t know what it is about 7pm, but once it strikes, I hit a wall and can no longer parent. It’s like I’m a character out of Cinderella who’s out past curfew and turns into a pumpkin.

Being a stay-at-home parent means you’re ON for your kids at all times. And with one kid who isn’t a lover of sleep, it means we sure do see lots of each other during all hours of the day and night.

By the time we’re finished with dinner, I have a hard time even being around my kids. Is that TMI? My tank is empty. I’ve reached my limit and I have nothing left. I just can’t seem to be enough for them.

*Disclaimer, my kids are freakin’ awesome. They may feel like too much, but they’re really not. They’re just regular kids, with regular needs. However, I am a human mama with human limitations. I don’t have boundless energy or infinite patience. Even on my best days, my kids can feel like way too much! And I can often feel like I’m not enough.

Regular kids + mama with limits = high chance of not being enough for them.

**Disclaimer 2: I know I can also be a little much. Being married to an introvert, I’ve learnt that when my husband has had a difficult day, I can be a little overbearing with my questions, requests and anecdotes.

It requires a conscious effort on my part to Tone. It. Down! and not be overbearing, demanding, naggy, clingy, desperado… ya know, all the most sought after qualities every man loves in his lady.

But it doesn’t stop there, folks!

Being too much or not enough is a struggle in many relationships dynamics.

Take friendships: we can all think of that one needy friend – hey, maybe you are that friend!

That one person who never seems to get enough of your time or attention. Who needs more of you than you can give, or are willing to give!

With unhealthy boundaries, we can feel like we’re stretched too thin in meeting the demands of our time and relationships.

We can feel like we’re either too much for some people, or not enough for others. To some, we may feel like a burden or a nuisance. While to others, no matter what we do or how much we give, it’s never enough.

This is the tension we all have to manage as people created with limitations in our time and mental capacity. We simply cannot be all things to all people (Scripture taken out of context, don’t @ me!).

He loves me. Even when I’m annoying and clingy!

To find any success in these areas, I humbly propose the following:

  • Recognize the struggle
  • Put healthy boundaries in place to manage time and responsibilities
  • Ask God for His empowering strength to face each day and its demands
  • And voilà! You win at life!

Ok, ok I’m obviously making ridiculous mom jokes. But the truth is that the heart of this blog post isn’t about boundaries, tips on time management, healthy vs. toxic friendships, or anything else like that.

What I’ve come to realize is this: our culture of unrealistic expectations means that we can so easily feel suffocated by the needs of others. Or on the flip side, we can feel the pressure to shrink ourselves in order to not be so overbearing.

Whichever side you tend to lean on, neither gives us a healthy view of God. That’s what I really want to shed light on here, and that’s the real tragedy of this whole thing.

Allow me to make a few things clear:

  • You will NEVER be too much for God.
  • You will NEVER be not enough for God (excuse the double negative, I’m making a point).
  • You will NEVER be misunderstood by God.
  • You will NEVER be a burden to God.
  • You will NEVER be annoying to God.
  • You will NEVER be insufficient to God.

Why? Because God is not like us! He doesn’t get tired. He doesn’t lose His patience. He doesn’t expect something from us that He knows we were never meant to give.

He doesn’t roll His eyes at our neediness. He doesn’t get exasperated at our worry. He doesn’t get frustrated with how long-winded our ramblings can be.

Yes, He disciplines those He loves (Hebrews 12:6) and He is angry at our sin (Isaiah 59:2).

But amazingly, God—so full of compassion—still forgives us! He covered over our sins with His love, refusing to destroy us all. Over and over He holds back His anger, restraining wrath to show us mercy.

Psalm 78:38 (narrative edit by me)

Whenever I feel overwhelmed by the people who overwhelm me, I have to consciously remind myself that God doesn’t get overwhelmed by me. He doesn’t need a break from me. He doesn’t get His fill or reach His limit of “Tina time”.

Because the Lord longs to be gracious to me; therefore He will rise up to show me compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him!

Isaiah 30:18
Sweet scooter gang

Where do you go to fill up when you’re empty? Who could ever truly be enough for you when you’re just not enough?

1 I look up to the mountains—
    does my help come from there?
2 My help comes from the Lord,
    who made heaven and earth!
3 He will not let you stumble;
    the one who watches over you will not slumber.
4 Indeed, He who watches over Israel
    never slumbers or sleeps.
5 The Lord Himself watches over you!
    The Lord stands beside you as your protective shade.
6 The sun will not harm you by day,
    nor the moon at night.
7 The Lord keeps you from all harm
    and watches over your life.
8 The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go,
    both now and forever.

– Psalm 121
  • God is always always always available to us. ALWAYS! (Hebrews 4:16)
  • He created us for Himself! For the sole purpose of being in relationship with Him. (Romans 11:36)
  • He is fully aware of all our limitations and toxic traits, and they do not deter him from us. (Hebrews 4:15)
  • He knows every little thing about us, and still loves us completely. (Psalm 139 – all of it! Read it with fresh eyes when you need the reminder that God doesn’t think you’re too much or not enough.)
  • When we put our faith in His Son, Jesus, we are covered by Him, and can have full access to fountain that never runs dry. (John 4:14)

When you’ve been burnt enough times by people who want you to be less of yourself, or demanding more than you have to give, please please please – remember that Jesus is not like that. Yes, He asks us to lay down our lives to follow Him (Luke 9:23), but it’s so He can give us abundant life in return!

I have come to give you everything in abundance, more than you expect —life in its fullness until you overflow!

– John 10:10

I’d say that’s a trade in our favour, friends! So when you feel hesitant to go to God with your frustrations, questions, qualms, and needs – don’t! Don’t feel hesitant! He’s not burnt out by you. He has more for you than you could ever need.

What’s in the Ears

This week we’re showcasing not 1, but 2 songs!

The first was an obvious choice and truly ministers to the heart.

This is a perfect song for our topic too! It’s a recent release and the whole album is really powerful.

Talk to me, friend! Do you ever feel like you’re too much or not enough for your people?
Where does this land for you? Do you ever project those feelings onto God? Let me know in the comments or send me a DM!

No Parking Zone

Published on by tinavila206 Comments

It was a quiet evening in June. I was cleaning up after dinner and my husband was getting our baby boy ready for bed. Life. Was. Goooooood. Though if I’m being honest, I’m sure I didn’t necessarily think so since I’ve been known to over-dramatizing things (not that my husband would EVER confirm this preposterous notion).

I digress…

While cleaning, I felt what can only be described as an earthquake. The entire house shook and rattled. My husband ran into the kitchen holding our son, and we met each other with matching looks of horror and perplexity.

Turns out a car drove full speed into our house. Of course…?

We stepped outside and sure enough, there it was. Half a car out on our lawn, the other half suspended in mid-air through a car-shaped hole in our basement.

So here’s what happened:

  • The car hanging out of our house actually belonged to our neighbour from across the street
  • This neighbour was completely sober
  • She meant to back into her own driveway
  • She realized she was going forward and meant to slam the breaks
  • She slammed the gas pedal even harder instead
  • She had recently lost a dear friend to cancer; her mind was preoccupied
  • Thankfully, she walked away without a scratch
Just your average car-in-a-house scenario.

We had not been living in our home for even a full year when this freak accident took place.

As the damage was assessed and we took inventory of our home, one thing was clear: our lives were spared that day.

For awhile, I was in a state of shock. The thought of what could have been… all the what if’s that run through your head rent-free in the aftermath of any accident… it was scary to think about!

So this is where my head went: Had the accident taken place just a few minutes later, my husband and I would have been sitting on the couch in our usual cozy spots, probably watching the Habs game or a new episode of The Office.

I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious…

– M.G.S.

The car rammed through the outer wall of our basement family room punching a 100 lbs window through the other side. That window then flew across the room, landing on a couch where we usually sit. It’s likely that we would have absorbed the force of that window.

Not to overdramatize (because, y’all know that’s not my vibe), but we truly were minutes away from that reality. Thank God that wasn’t the case.

The entire basement had to be renovated, and the exterior of our house refinished as well due to car-sized damage to brick and siding.

Thank you Lord for home insurance.

We used an old door to board up the hole until it could be repaired.

We had only JUST moved into our home less than a year before. We were finally out of boxes and had arranged everything exactly how we wanted it to be. So this surprise reno definitely was not what we wanted, not what we’d planned. It wasn’t well timed, nor did it make sense!

A few months later, it really did turn out lovely and we were so happy with the finished work. The insurance was fair in their appraisals, which made our newly-renovated home a true gift.

First Easy Takeaway: there are a lot of places one could park their vehicle. A neighbour’s basement is most certainly not on one of them.

So what’s the point of all this besides a bit of blockbuster entertainment with a side of shock value?

For awhile, I asked God that very questions. What was the point of that?! Sometimes things in life just happen. I don’t believe God is the cause of all of it, but anything we experience is allowed by God. So why did God allow that?

Well, it took a few more years to see the big picture.

In my last blog post, I shared about a big opportunity my husband had to start a new job, in a new town. So when he was offered a pastoring position at Meadow Brook Church, we knew we had to sell our house because we weren’t about to add a 10-hour commute to our daily lives.

And there it was. Our big picture.

Second Easy Takeaway: If you know anything about real estate (of which I possess nearly zero knowledge), you know that unless there are extreme fluctuations in the market, it’s wise to sit on a piece of real estate for awhile before selling for profit. Unless you’re flipping a fixer-upper, it’s not likely that you’ll turn a huge profit if you try selling within only a few years of buying.

God’s Providence

I find this to be increasingly true:

Those who leave everything in God’s hands, will eventually see God’s hand in everything.

I derive a lot, and I mean SO MUCH comfort in seeing God working in the tiny details of my life. In those little things that seem inconsequential… I KNOW He is doing a work for my good, and His glory.

Our finished home for sale before moving to Leamington!

Our freak accident ended up increasing the value of our home significantly. Less than two years later, we made the life-changing decision to move our family 10 hours away for a new ministry opportunity.

We only lived in our first home for three years when all was said and done. But the ripple effects of that woman driving into our house are still felt every single day of my life.

You see, when we finally decided to move to a new town, we couldn’t have known what a sizeable downpayment would mean to us. Compared to Montreal’s market, the market in our town was laughable six years ago (in case you’re unaware, it’s terrifying today).

Because the house we bought cost significantly less than what we sold for, we were able to drop an entire income (I was teaching then) and take on a mortgage that could be supported by one salary.

It was a big priority for us to have a parent home while our children are young, but making that happen in Montreal felt like an impossibility. I love of all these tiny, but wild details God orchestrated to make this dream come true. I’ve been home with our babes ever since!

Ok yes, so I do complain about #momlife a fair bit, but that’s not the point here! Don’t @ me!

Friend, please hear my heart in this: Sometimes it feels like you’re living under a storm cloud. Like you can’t catch a break. You keep facing set backs, breakdowns, meltdowns, and attacks from the devil that just don’t make sense. Like a car driving into your house?

Sometimes God delivers us from our troubles on our timeline. But sometimes He doesn’t. Sometimes He works things out in ways we couldn’t have imagined. Because His ways are not our ways! And as high as the heavens are above the earth, so are His ways higher than ours. (Isaiah 55:9)

What’s really really really cool, is CHOOSING to leave those things in His hands, and then seeing His hand work out all the details… in His time. FOR. HIS. GLORY!

So rather than staring at half a car hanging out your basement and thinking, am I cursed?

Ask instead, God, what are you working out in all this?! He will NOT disappoint. He is faithful and true and He’s always for your good.

What’s in the Ears

This song is too good, and I didn’t mean for this to be so perfectly suited to the topic, but it is. Enjoy!

Have some questions or thoughts to share on any of this? Send me a message or comment below!!

First Impressions

Published on by tinavila201 Comment

They can be a lot of pressure! What comes to mind, is an opportunity my husband and I had six years ago to make a good first impression with potentially life-changing results.

We had been interviewing at various churches across North America in search of a new ministry opportunity. When one church in Southern Ontario invited us for a two-day visit including a formal interview and to meet some church leaders and the staff.

Quaint Windsor airport. Heading back to Montreal after our interview!

I remember the anticipation leading up to the interview as we took time to prepare, dream, pray, and freak out! Ok fine, I probably did the freaking out. My husband was calm, cool, and ready. Which is a good thing too, because he was doing 99% of the interview.

Besides the anticipated interview questions, I couldn’t help but consider how I might be perceived.

I knew all about that stereotype of a pastor wife vibe. I also knew I didn’t check all the boxes.

  • Love Jesus ✔️ (but I’m not great at trusting and obeying Him)
  • Love others ✔️ (but reeeeeeeally not as well I should)
  • Read my Bible ✔️ (but I find parts of it boring… yes, even me, the one obsessed with the Scriptures)
  • Pray everyday ✔️ (do drowsy bedtime prayers count?)
  • Listen exclusively to worship music (yeah, no… please don’t ask for my Spotify history)
  • Never cuss (define never…. damn it! What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?)
  • Passion for children and youth (umm sorry husband, you might not get the job and it’s all my fault)

It was so stressful to think about what kind of first impression I’d be giving during those first encounters.

Well, spoiler alert: I didn’t blow it. My husband landed the gig! And it was 6 years ago this past week, since that whirlwind weekend of first impressions.

Why are first impressions such a big deal? What is it about being asked to describe ourselves that makes us want to run for the hills instead?

Whether it’s:

  • a blind date
  • job interview
  • first day of school
  • first day on the job
  • meeting the in laws
  • or a small group Bible study…

The intense pressure we feel to project the best possible version of ourselves is truly palpable.

Hi, I’m God.

I’m willing to bet He did not feel the pressure, but in the book of Exodus, we find one of the very first times God describes Himself in Scripture. How cool is that?!

Let’s check it out!

5 Then the Lord came down in a cloud and stood there with him [Moses]; and He called out His own name, Yahweh. 6 “Yahweh! The LORD!
    The God of grace and mercy!
I am slow to anger
    and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness.
7 I lavish unfailing love to a thousand generations.
    I forgive iniquity, rebellion, and sin.
But I do not excuse the guilty.
    I lay the sins of the parents upon their children and grandchildren;
the entire family is affected—
    even children in the third and fourth generations.”

– Exodus 34:5-7

Honestly, it gives me chills just thinking about it. After an already wild start for humanity, God’s like: “Ok, this is it y’all. Here’s a little about me and what I’m all about.”

It’s been said, if you want to know what God’s like, just look at Jesus. But I would argue that God had been revealing Himself to His people, and trying to make Himself known and understood long before Christ walked the earth.

So I say, if you want to know what God is like, Exodus 34:5-7 is a great place to start!

Naturally, God starts with His name – actually, names!

Yahweh: The earliest recorded name of God, spelled YHWH in Hebrew. The name in itself is considered so sacred and holy it couldn’t even be uttered! Yahweh means “He who brings whatever exists into being”.

The LORD: When in all uppercase, it is another name for God. And there is none like Him!

God goes on to describe His character by painting a picture of who He specifically is in relation to His people.

Every facet of God’s character contains these attributes in their fullness. He isn’t one more than another. As James 1:17 puts it, “there is no variation or shadow of turning – nothing deceitful, nothing two-faced or fickle.”

Even though God is fully and completely all these characteristics, I love that He starts with grace. It’s a lesson in my own life to extend it for others and to receive it for myself.

Grace is receiving goodness from God, which we do not deserve and could do nothing to earn. (Ephesians 2:8-9)

Mercy is God withholding punishment we deserve and extending pardon and forgiveness instead. (Deuteronomy 4:31)

Being slow to anger has to do with God’s patience and delay in displaying His wrath against sin. Also related to His long-suffering and how He patiently endures our offences and rebellion against Him. (Psalm 103:8)

Unfailing love is SO hard for us to get our minds around because we cannot produce a love that is so unconditional or steadfast, but God’s love really is! (Romans 5:8)

Faithfulness: This scripture says it best, “If we are faithless, He remains faithful— for He cannot deny Himself.” (2 Timothy 2:13)

How are these characteristics manifested? FORGIVENESS!

God forgives iniquity, rebellion, and sin… to a thousand generations! (Deuteronomy 7:9)

That’s really good news!

But we can’t fully appreciate how good that news really is unless we read the whole of verse 7. Sorry y’all.

We’d rather ignore the reality of 7b, and live on the good graces of a God who extends unfailing love to a thousand generations.

But friends,

…what would have been the point of Jesus’ death, then?

We cheapen His sacrifice when we downplay our sin and its consequences!

The following paints a sobering picture:

“We’re not really surprised that God has redeemed us. Somewhere deep inside, in the secret chambers of our hearts we harbour the notion that God owes us His mercy. Heaven would not be quite the same if we were excluded from it. We know that we are sinners, but we’re surely not as bad as we could be. There are enough redeeming features to our personalities that if God is really just, He will include us in salvation. What amazes us is justice, not grace.”

– R. C. Sproul

Justice has to be served. We’d expect that from an earthly court with a human judge! So of course a God of justice has to punish the guilty, or else He wouldn’t be true to Himself.

However, and this is a big HOWEVER! If that’s where we stop, then there’s not much good about the Good News, is there?

It’s only in understanding that Jesus took on God’s wrath against our own sin, in our place, that we find the very best ending to ANY story.

Faith in Jesus means that we are always under the banner of mercy, not judgement. And God’s default for us is mercy every time to a thousand generations.

I’m reminded that mercy TRIUMPHS or REJOICES over judgement (James 2:13). Knowing God errs on the side of mercy means the Good News isn’t just good, it’s life-changing!

So whether it’s an opportunity to make a good first impression, as in our experience; or a chance to get to know the unfailing love of God – those initial interactions truly matter because they have a lasting impact on how any relationship will unfold.

What’s in the Ears

Y’all this song! A reminder that it’s His kindness that leads us to change (repent). He’s so good.

I felt so compelled to share about the richness of this passage, but they don’t call them hard truths for nothing! Can you share your own thoughts on it with me? Send me a message or comment below!

Bandaids on a Gunshot Wound

Published on by tinavila202 Comments

5-step program! 4 smart solutions! 3 easy payments! 2 effective strategies! 1 piece of advice!

Does it not draw us in to think that all our troubles could magically go away so easily?! Wouldn’t we all love a quick fix to life’s woes?

Living in a world that prides itself in efficiency and results, it’s no wonder the Easter story, and the wild notion that Jesus’ death can transform your life, appear downright foolish. And if not foolish, at least perplexing.

The reality is that we fool ourselves by believing that our bandaid-solutions will make ANY lasting difference to our broken lives here, or in eternity. Because it’s not about steps of improvement to implement, but a Person to know, a Redeemer to save!

Once we see that the real transformative power Jesus offers is the only real solution to our fatal problem, we’re then awakened to the futility of our own self-help efforts.

Like bandaids on a gunshot wound.

Please hear my heart through this intensity of a ramble…

NOTHING has had a greater impact on my life than simply doing life with Jesus.

  • Trusting Him with the unknown.
  • Trusting Him with circumstances I can’t control.
  • Trusting Him with whatever I want to change but don’t know how to (no matter how many bandaids).
  • Ultimately trusting Him with the salvation of my very soul!
  • To believe that God created all of us for more than what our eyes can see.

Because if we could see it, we wouldn’t need God to do it, that’s why it’s faith! (Pastor Mike Todd said it first)

Sin: The Gunshot Wound

If I really had to reduce it all to a step-program, I suppose that acknowledging our own sin as the problem would have to be the first step. You can then follow that with having the faith to believe God for our solution.

But if we fail to recognize the true consequence of sin on our lives, and acknowledge the fatality of this gunshot wound to our very existence, then I suppose a quick fix bandaid works just fine in deluding us into believing that God sending Jesus is unnecessary or irrelevant.

Thankfully God’s offer of salvation is available to anyone who will to accept it. It isn’t any less true whether you believe it or not.

2 Corinthians 5:21 gives us a beautiful, yet simple synopsis of the Easter story:

God made Jesus, who had no sin, to be sin for us. So that in Jesus, we might become right with God.

Unfortunately, until we truly taste and see how GOOD He is, “we basically reduce Jesus to a cultural icon, rather than the living, resurrected Saviour. And apart from Him we can do absolutely nothing” (Dr. Crawford Loritts). That’s why the quick fix can never work. In the ancient world, the sacrificial system offered a way for people to be made right with God. But like I keep saying, it was a bandaid solution!

Today, the sum of our good deeds can make us feel like we’ve earned our way into God’s good graces. And with polarizing views on what good deeds actually look like, it’s hard to know if you’re even getting that right in the first place!

11 Under the old covenant, the priest stands and ministers before the altar day after day, offering the same sacrifices again and again, which can never take away sins. 12 But our High Priest I offered Himself to God as a single sacrifice for sins, good for all time. 14 For by that one offering He forever made perfect those who are being made holy. 16 “This is the new covenant I will make
with my people on that day, says the Lord:
I will put my laws in their hearts,
and I will write them on their minds.”
17 Then He says, “I will never again remember
 their sins and lawless deeds.”
18 And when sins have been forgiven, there is no need to offer any more sacrifices.

– Hebrews 10:11-18

I’m so grateful that Jesus’ sacrifice isn’t only about taking on the consequence of my sin and the reality of whatever awaits us in the afterlife, which is obviously a big deal!

But His sacrifice has amazing consequences in this life too! For an abundant life (John 10:10) and peace beyond understanding (Philippians 4:7).

I need me some peace to get through each day. I need confidence in knowing I can be right with God. That even if I make mistakes, I don’t have to carry the weight of my sin through life. And my identity can now be found in Him.

I don’t have to try to cover my tracks by putting bandaids on gunshot wounds and hoping for the best. I can KNOW with confidence that I’m forgiven, I’m redeemed – for a purpose!

Tim Keller says that Christian identity is the only one that is received, not achieved. This means that transformation doesn’t depend on my performance, but when we accept Jesus’ sacrifice, we receive a new identity as a child of God – forgiven and loved.

And that’s such good news!

Because when it comes down to it, what we really need is good news, not good advice. We don’t need good advice to follow, but good news to believe. One is about tips and tricks, the other is transformative.

I echo Paul’s question in Romans 2:4, don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that His kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?

This may sound cynical, but unfortunately, I don’t think we actually care for God’s kindness, when all we want is quick solutions to our problems. It grieves me to think that we completely miss what God offers us when we fail to recognize how amazing His mercy and grace really are.

When we reduce the Easter story and God’s plan of salvation to simply being good enough or bad enough, we miss the point! Because that’s not what God’s grace is about! We bring the wrong solutions to a problem only God can rectify. “It’s not about being good or bad. It’s about being dead or alive!” (Louie Giglio) None of us could ever be good enough to get to heaven. No matter how many tips and tricks we try. It’s about recognizing our need for a Saviour, and then being made alive in Him.

For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death.

– 2 Corinthians‬ ‭7:10‬ ‭

I guess that would be it. The big tip. The main point. I love how the Corinthians author addresses the difference between godly sorrow and worldly sorrow. One leads to repentance, salvation, and life! The other is filled with regret, shame, and death.

Let’s be sorry for our sin, but let’s bring it to the foot of the cross where we can exchange it for fullness of life and a new identity as children of God. Not just a bandaid-solution, but a complete transformation from the inside out.

More than a bandaid

The following verse – stripped of any complex theology, in all its simplicity – is the best possible way I can think to conclude. The story goes like this: Jesus heals a blind man. Religious leaders (who happen to be spiritually blind themselves!) give him flack about it. And all he says is…

“I have no idea what kind of man He is. All I know is this: I was blind, but now I see.”

– John 9:25

And that’s the beauty of the whole dang thing.

Many people, much smarter than I, have ventured to answer life’s tough questions and solve humanities impossible problems to no avail… I don’t know everything about Jesus. All I know is this: I was dead inside, but now I’m alive. I was blind, but now I see.

What’s in the Ears

Comment below or send me a message with any thoughts or questions on this Easter post that’s so dear to my heart! I just love to hear from you.